elisi's humble abode

I'm not good at this, but I figure it can double as a 'If you ever had any questions, go on and ask' posts.

So hello new people! (Also hello new people that just have added me quietly at some point. And hello lurkers! And hello old friends!)

I'm 37, happily married to an independent film maker, Darcy, (this is a new career path for him, but what he's always wanted to do - he finished an MA in film production last year, so he actually knows what he's doing!), and we have three daughters. Miss M (15), Impish Girl (12) and The Cherub (8). All good fangirls. (When we went to see Day of the Doctor in the cinema, Impish Girl and the Cherub cos-played as Eleven and little Amelia, complete with fez & little suitcase. ♥ Darcy is partially named so in my LJ for thinking all the fannish stuff is strange and peculiar - rather like the original Darcy viewed the Bennet family.)


I work fulltime in a local College (mostly 16-18 year olds) in an admin position. Oh and I live in England if that wasn't clear. (Used to be a stay-at-home mum when the girls were small, so I still wonder where all the time went.) Did a foundation course in Art a long time ago. Still love art, but love writing more, I think.

I don't tend to talk much about RL, as I lack the talent for making it sound exiting. Although the stories I could tell from work as something else. Should probably write a book, except I'd get sued. *g*


For fannish stuff, then there's links on my sidebar to selected fic/meta and Master Posts. Both BtVS/AtS & Doctor Who & Torchwood. Although my heart belongs to Eleven, I am still exceedingly fond of Ten, and he was the one who first made me fannish about Doctor Who. <3 My very small claim to fame is that I wrote an essay for Chicks Unravel Time.

In general fannish news, I'm currently trying to actually pull myself together and write the Clara meta I've been thinking about since Christmas. If you're curious, then the whole thing is basically summed up in my icon. (You can also go watch purplefringe's Never Look Away and niyalune's The State of Dreaming, which will give a good background to my thoughts.)

This afternoon we came across Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory (that's the orginal one with Gene Wilder) as we channel hopped, and I was struck by how perfect a Trickster character Willy Wonka is. (I don't have time to delve further, and I'm sure you don't need me to. I mean, just look at this clip!) ETA: OK, couldn't help myself. Had to embed this...



Also, I've been meaning to pull out these parts of Mark's review of LotR (from Chapter 6 of The Two Towers). He might not be analytical, but he is reflective:

It was interesting to me that Théoden harked on a single point: that Gandalf always brought about bad news, bad tidings, or bad luck. Wormtongue, who appears to be some sort of assistant or official counsel to the King of the Mark, makes the same point, though he adds that Gandalf meddles. Even if this is ultimately shown to be an attempt by Wormtongue to thwart Rohan, I still think there’s some truth here. Gandalf really does meddle! He is a brilliant wizard and he’s rarely shown to be wrong, but he appears in people’s lives, changes them, and then leaves. I would actually be happy to see Tolkien address this further myself.
[...]
I was impressed with Gandalf’s decision to allow Wormtongue to live and choose his fate, and it’s something that relates to what I brought up earlier. Gandalf meddles, yes, but he leaves people with a choice. He did this with Bilbo in The Hobbit, and he did it with Frodo at the beginning of the book, and now he gives Wormtongue a choice.

Which in turn reminded me that I wanted to post ( this! )

Thoughts inspired by the posts by gabrielleabelle and shadowkat67, because of the fact that Mark actually now makes his living with his blog (and good for him! I've not got any problems with this at all). But it's still weird for the rest of us...

Let me start with a Moffat quote which sprang to mind:

No, you're not understanding me. I'm a proper, paid up, head-full-of-lists fan. Lots of my friends are fans too, I go to the fan gathering every month in the Fitzroy ... I think we're all lovely, and don't need to be kept in basements. Well, except him. And him. And those two. And her.

But when I write the show I put my professional telly head on and try to address the occasional viewer. Cos that's the vast majority of the audience. Getting lost in the fan perspective, can be a problem - and such an easy trap for me! As far as feedback goes, I prefer it from the playground or the pub.

Mark is, essentially, that 'occasional viewer'. Sure he's watching his way through the whole thing with determination, but his posts are reaction posts. To him, Buffy is just a story, and he looks at it like a story, whereas most of us, I'd wager, looked past the story 223 metaphors ago. We would (and many did) PAY to watch the show, not the other way around...

It is, essentially, the difference between initial reaction and subsequent analysis. It's nice for him that he has a market for his initial impressions, but I, personally, would not be interested in either writing & selling something like that, nor buying it, since first impressions are [for us] merely the starting point, not the end product. That's why it's weird. (Heck just look at all these posts we're writing trying to analyse why it feels weird.)

Which reminds me - I'm also following his 'Mark Reads LotR' (which has made me go hunt out trailers & clips from the movies, 'cause OMG the nostalgia), but that slight disconnect there is between his viewing of a show from the '90 through today's eyes? Is HUGE when it comes to LoTR. He is very character focussed, and it's just WEIRD. Tolkien is all story (history), and reactions like 'How can he DO this to so-and-so???' just make me tilt my head, because it just doesn't fit... (Do you know what I mean? Tolkien has marvellous characters, but he's so far from Joss as to be on another planet.)

I like Mark, he's fun and entertaining, but when it comes to 'proper, paid up, head-full-of-lists fans' (like us) look no further than Tea at the Ford, Slayage, Whedonistas, Chicks Dig Timelords, etc... (I'm not saying that Mark couldn't become one of us. Just that he isn't yet.)

Reading 'Mark Watches Buffy' has made me think. Actually, it was this comment by beer_good_foamy to my previous post which really kick-started things:

I'm completely hooked on Mark Watches Buffy. It's so, well, cute how he thinks he has a rough idea of where the show is going from here - and he hasn't even seen Spike and Dru, he has no idea who Giles is, he has no clue about where Willow is going, he thinks Angelus is something that happened in the past... I'm not sure if it's fannishness or sadism that's making me read these reviews, poor kid's in for a world of hurt. :D

Because Mark just flails and CAPSLOCKS and keels over every time the show does something unexpected. He's only just finished 'School Hard' (money quote: HOW IS ALL OF THIS HAPPENING IN THE THIRD EPISODE?) and knowing all the twists and turns that are coming does make the reviews sort of impossible to resist - it'll be ridiculously entertaining watching him have all his expectations demolished.

But here's the thing: He's not exactly a novice when it comes to TV. The second he saw Spike & Angel interact he knew that there must be a gazillion slash fics out there. He's just not used to how BtVS operates... Which made me wonder about how I see the world (as in - TV shows), and how much I've been shaped by BtVS. I've always said that it taught me everything, which is true, but now I'm wondering what it's like for people whose formative fannish experience wasn't Buffy? Who aren't always waiting for the other shoe to drop (people are happy = HORRIBLE THINGS are about to happen); who aren't used to EVERYTHING being subverted; who aren't familiar with the fact that ANYONE could die (and on the flipside - ANYONE could come back, if necessary)...

I'm not entirely sure if this means that I'm suffering from Post-Traumatic Joss Syndrome or whether I've somehow become immune to Righteous ['You Can't DO That!'] Anger/Surprise. (I can get angry with writers, but only if the writing is bad. If they want to end the show with 'Rock Fall, Everyone Dies', then - as long as that's an ending that makes sense - I'll not complain.)

Does any of this make sense? I feel like I've got the hang of something, but I'm terrible at formulating it. I think... it's the idea that a show has to keep to a formula? And then people get upset if it doesn't. It's the constant subversion and the radical changes of Buffy that makes it so different, I guess. Nothing is static, and nothing set in stone. And that is my attitude to anything I watch. For someone to be so SURPRISED at this really just throws me...

Have spent most of the day tidying the house. Although it is much nicer to have a tidy house than a messy one, tidying is still horribly dull. Plus, why is it that other people's houses always seem so much better organised? And why do we have so much stuff? (I'd happily bin most of the stuff but most of it isn't mine, so I can't. *sigh*)

Also Darcy - after spending most of yesterday working in the garden - has once more retreated to bed, unwell, which would have been awkward enough in itself, even if we hadn't promised Impish Girl that she could have two of her best friends over tonight for a sleepover...

They're lovely girls though, so I don't really mind, but the noise level has increased rather dramatically. On the plus side they're keeping each other entertained.

Basically I can't wait until next week when they all go back to school - I've had way too little time to myself these past two weeks, and I crave solitude too much for words! (Is this the most boring LJ entry I've ever written? Quite possibly...)

Oh wait, I did get something done! I posted the final chapter of Alien Abduction yesterday, and am now going to dive into the sequel to My Immortal - I've been looking at my draft now and again, and the first chapter is looking pretty decent. (It's very different to the original fic, btw. Where My Immortal was (mostly) one long, continuous story, the sequel will be more like a lot of interconnected short fics, fitting into S2 and 3 of TW.)

And now I should probably get the girls to get ready for bed and bring Darcy a cup of tea and generally be productive and not mess around on LJ.

Changed my layout (again), although for once I made the banner myself. (This is somewhat of an overstatement - I added text to a picture! *g*) Guess this'll get all the lovers of German art house cinema to come out of the wood work... (ETA: The picture is from 'Wings of Desire' - the German title is 'Der Himmel Uber Berlin' - which is probably best described as a contemplation on life and what it means to be human. Oh, and the guy in the banner is indeed an angel aspiring to be human.)

Also snagged this icon from promethia_tenk, since I love it very much and she said it was OK. (It was this, or find one that said 'Little Miss Pretentious'. *points to banner*)

By the way, is anyone else watching 'Episodes'? It's probably too clever for its own good, but I find it oddly compelling. (Even though I have to watch some parts through my fingers.)

Oh! That leads me to 'How TV Ruined Your Life', which Darcy and I caught last night, because we are rather partial to Charlie Brooker. (By the way, did you know that he is married to Konnie Huq? Yes, that Konnie Huq!)

For foreigners here is Charlie Brooker talking about American news media - Fox in particular - HIGHLY recommended! (Probably NSFW. There's some swearing...) Konnie Huq is best known as a Blue Peter presenter. (Blue Peter is a very famous children's show.) Really, opposites attract!

green_maia has a very interesting post here about enjoyment of abuse of power versus abuse of power rooted in despair. This is just me turning thoughts over in my head, so lots of rambling. ETA: Or you can just read my reply to her post, since that's like the whole of this post in two lines...

( The Doctor's actions in Family of Blood. )

Cold, wet and windy, and on the way home from taking the children to school the rain turned into semi-snowy slush. Am now drying all my clothes on radiators and never wanting to step outside the door again.

Meh.

(Although my mood icon is making me smile.)

Anyway, I shall bring you fic in a little while, but it is dark... I just felt like posting.

ETA: Btw thank you muchly to kathyh for the Christmas card which came a few days ago! (I am slooooow and forgetful!) *squish*

I've been re-reading Gaudy Night (like you do), and one sentence suddenly stood out. Well a lot of them did, obviously, because it's a wonderful book, but I've been thinking about how Peter and Harriet are my 'shipping blueprint, and there is was, perfectly:

That, then, was what he wanted her for. For some reason, obscure to herself and probably also to him, she had the power to force him outside his defences.

Because that is it - the thing that runs through every couple I've ever shipped. Buffy/Spike (although there it is him forcing her out of her defences), Jack/Ianto, Doctor/River, and - with a slight variation, in that these couples are also very old - Spike/Angel and Doctor/Master. Heck you can add Cutter/Leetah to that list, and Howl/Sophie - or even Elizabeth/Darcy... (um, not me. The Austen version.)

To quote the book again (it makes more sense in context - there's poetry involved - but I think it works on its own):

He did not want to forget, or to be quiet, or to be spared things, or to stay put. All he wanted was some kind of central stability, and he was apparently ready to take anything that came along, so long as it stimulated him to keep that precarious balance.

It's not about the strength of their [~romantic~] feelings (how *do* you measure love, anyway?), or about making each other happy; indeed a lot of my 'ships have at various points tried to kill each other. But that connection is still there, that ability to force honesty from each other:

"And I can fool Giles, and I can fool my friends, but I can't fool myself. Or Spike, for some reason."

"It's not pretty, but it's real."

I could go on, but I think this speaks for itself pretty well. All thoughts welcome.

(promethia_tenk have you finished it yet? *looks hopeful* My ear is open like a greedy shark to catch the tunings of a voice divine...)