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And Then The TARDIS Fell Into Pete’s World. Chapter 4.
I did mention procrastinating, didn't I? Here's the result. And I know I promised you more Rory, I'll get there in the next chapter, honestly!
Previouslies here. :)
Title: And Then The TARDIS Fell Into Pete’s World.
Rating: PG
Characters: TenToo, Rose, Eleven, Amy, Rory, River, Jackie.
Genre: AU crack!fic.
Spoilers: ALL OF S5 OMG!!!!
Setting: Post-The Big Bang.
Summary: The TARDIS falls into Pete’s World. Stuff happens. (I don’t know yet. It’s a thing in progress. Respect the thing.)
Wordcount: Approx 1400 words.
Chapter 4
For a few seconds there was silence as Jackie surveyed them in disbelief, but then the New Doctor took a step forward, grabbed hold of her shoulders, and kissed her firmly on both cheeks.
“Jackie Tyler, wonderful to see you! You haven’t changed a bit!”
This latest version of the Doctor obviously seemed able to do what none of the others had: Render Rose’s mother speechless.
Although Rose was distracted from this unusual sight by a barely audible whisper from River.
“Oh Doctor, you shouldn’t have...”
Jackie’s silence, of course, was never going to last long.
“No...” she said, and the New Doctor smiled.
“Oh yes.”
“It’s not! Honestly, Doctor is that you?”
“The one, the only, and the best!” he said, winking at Rose’s Doctor who could only stare, stunned.
“...I’m sorry?”
The New Doctor’s face clouded over.
“Ah. Of course. Jackson Lake was after your time. That was supposed to have been a little in-joke...”
Jackie shook her head and cut through his apology.
“So you’ve got new face? Again? Oh this is ridiculous!”
“Trust me, you don’t know the half of it,” River cut in, holding out her hand to Jackie.
“Doctor River Song, and I am more thrilled to meet you than you can imagine.”
Jackie looked distinctly taken aback, and cautiously took the proffered hand, looking River over from curly hair to sturdy, stylish boots, and seemed unable to make up her mind.
“Really? Why?”
River smiled widely.
“Before he met you he’d never been slapped by anyone’s mother, which I refused to believe, but he swore blind that it was true. Nine hundred years - thank goodness you came along to teach him some sense. What did he do by the way? He left out that part of the story.”
“Kidnapped her for a year!” Jackie replied, pointing to Rose, and River raised an eyebrow. The New Doctor looked uncomfortable.
“Just went off for a few adventures and, you know, meant to leave a 12 hour gap in her time. But the TARDIS... well, it ended up as 12 months.”
“Ah,” River commented drily. “The usual.”
Amy made an odd dismissive sound. “Only twelve months? Consider yourself lucky!”
“Excuse me?” Jackie asked. “And who are you?”
“Amy Pond. Nice to meet you. When I was seven years old he crashed into my garden. To cut a long story short, he promised me to be back in 5 minutes.”
“How long was it then?” Rose asked, curious, and Amy lifted an eyebrow.
“Twelve years!”
“Twelve years?” Jackie repeated, incredulous.
“Look-” the New Doctor cut in, “the TARDIS was breaking apart, the engines were phasing...”
“Twelve years-” Amy said, in the tone of voice that showed that she knew she was going to win the argument, “-and four psychiatrists!”
“Four?” Jackie said, eyes widening, and Rory pulled an embarrassed face.
“She... kept biting them.”
The New Doctor dragged a hand through his hair.
“But we re-wrote time...”
“Still had the psychiatrists, Raggedy Man!” Amy countered.
“You re-wrote time?” Rose’s Doctor cut in, shocked, and the New Doctor beamed.
“Ah yes. The universe was ending so I rebooted it. Big Bang 2! One of my better ideas, if I say so myself!”
“Apart from the part where you erased yourself from existence,” Amy observed, and the New Doctor smiled triumphantly.
“Ah but I had you, didn’t I?” he said, tapping her nose. “The Doctor and Amy Pond, and the days that came after all.”
“You... erased yourself...” Rose’s Doctor echoed, faintly, grasping onto Rose’s hand with more vigour than usual, and the New Doctor opened his arms to encompass them all.
“I did, but it all worked out as you can see. Brilliant story! A fairy tale as a matter of fact. Why don’t we go get a cup of tea and tell you the whole thing?”
“Story time is all well and good Doctor,” Jackie chimed in, “but thanks to you, I’m going to be late for picking up Tony from school.”
She shot the TARDIS a speculative look.
“Unless you wanna give us a lift?”
The New Doctor looked alarmed.
”What? No no no. She needs rest.”
Jackie frowned.
”She who?”
”The TARDIS! We just fell through the Void, and before that-”
Jackie folded her arms. “Oh come on, we’re just picking up one little boy, and not even going anywhere weird, just a few miles down the road. I’ll never make it in the car now, the traffic at this time of day is just atrocious!”
The New Doctor looked torn, but River shook her head and pulled out a TARDIS key.
“Oh stop being difficult, Darling. If it’s that much of a bother I’ll take her.”
Jackie turned to her sharply.
“What? You can fly that thing?”
River just smiled enigmatically and opened the door, and the New Doctor sighed deeply and waved his hand at River.
“Very well. Go on in! I’m coming.”
Head held high in triumph Jackie walked through the door, and then stopped.
“Oh. My. God! You’ve redecorated!”
The New Doctor smirked as she turned around in the doorway, staring at him, but his face fell as she continued.
“Do you think you could do something about my kitchen? I’ve had the builders in for weeks now, and they’re bloody useless! And Himself-” she pointed at Rose’s Doctor, “-just hides and says he doesn’t have the right tools.”
The New Doctor looked like he was trying to find the best way of saying ‘Absolutely not, no way, and also never!’ when River answered.
”Of course he’ll help,” she said, eyeing the New Doctor, eyes dancing. “For a start sonic screwdrivers are just wonderful for putting up shelves!”
Jackie slowly looked from one to the other.
“Listen - are you two married or something?”
For the longest moment no one spoke. The New Doctor was watching River with the most peculiar look on his face - part deer-caught-in-headlights, but (bizarrely) more like he was genuinely curious as to what her answer would be.
Finally River turned back to Jackie.
“It’s... complicated. Let’s just go with ‘Or Something’ for now. But come in and tell me where your son’s school in...”
When the two women had vanished inside, the New Doctor leaned sideways into Rose’s Doctor’s personal space, hands clasped together.
“I feel a sudden urge to apologise profusely for abandoning you here,” he said, and Rose’s Doctor lifted his eyebrows to comical heights.
“Better late than never, I suppose...” he replied, studying the New Doctor cooly, before the familiar devil-may-care smile lit up his face, and he slapped the New Doctor’s back.
“Nah, I’m just kidding. Love it here really. And - you might not know this - but I’ve got a bit of Donna’s voice tucked away, and that can shut up even Jackie Tyler, trust me!”
“Good. Good,” the New Doctor replied, not looking like he was feeling any better at all, and then Jackie stuck her head round the door.
“Look are you coming? Clock’s ticking!”
“It’s a time machine,” the New Doctor complained, shoulders hunched in frustration as he followed her inside, “How many times must I explain it?”
Then, a few seconds after the door had closed, the New Doctor opened it again, searching out Rose’s eyes.
“Rose - be a dear and pop the kettle on? I think I’ll be needing that cuppa a great deal by the time we get back.”
“Um... sure,” she replied, and he gave her happy thumbs up before abruptly rolling his eyes (presumably at something Jackie had said) and shutting the door again, the TARDIS cranking out of existence a moment later.
‘Great. I’m now the Doctor’s Tea Lady,” Rose thought to herself, and tried her best to smile at Amy and Rory. It wasn’t their fault that the Doctor was now a weirdo with a bow tie.
“Um... Doctor?” Rory asked, clearly a little unsure how to address Rose’s Doctor, but looking relieved when the response was an encouraging nod, “I don’t mean to be rude, but... would you mind explaining why there are two of you?”
TBC.
Previouslies here. :)
Title: And Then The TARDIS Fell Into Pete’s World.
Rating: PG
Characters: TenToo, Rose, Eleven, Amy, Rory, River, Jackie.
Genre: AU crack!fic.
Spoilers: ALL OF S5 OMG!!!!
Setting: Post-The Big Bang.
Summary: The TARDIS falls into Pete’s World. Stuff happens. (I don’t know yet. It’s a thing in progress. Respect the thing.)
Wordcount: Approx 1400 words.
For a few seconds there was silence as Jackie surveyed them in disbelief, but then the New Doctor took a step forward, grabbed hold of her shoulders, and kissed her firmly on both cheeks.
“Jackie Tyler, wonderful to see you! You haven’t changed a bit!”
This latest version of the Doctor obviously seemed able to do what none of the others had: Render Rose’s mother speechless.
Although Rose was distracted from this unusual sight by a barely audible whisper from River.
“Oh Doctor, you shouldn’t have...”
Jackie’s silence, of course, was never going to last long.
“No...” she said, and the New Doctor smiled.
“Oh yes.”
“It’s not! Honestly, Doctor is that you?”
“The one, the only, and the best!” he said, winking at Rose’s Doctor who could only stare, stunned.
“...I’m sorry?”
The New Doctor’s face clouded over.
“Ah. Of course. Jackson Lake was after your time. That was supposed to have been a little in-joke...”
Jackie shook her head and cut through his apology.
“So you’ve got new face? Again? Oh this is ridiculous!”
“Trust me, you don’t know the half of it,” River cut in, holding out her hand to Jackie.
“Doctor River Song, and I am more thrilled to meet you than you can imagine.”
Jackie looked distinctly taken aback, and cautiously took the proffered hand, looking River over from curly hair to sturdy, stylish boots, and seemed unable to make up her mind.
“Really? Why?”
River smiled widely.
“Before he met you he’d never been slapped by anyone’s mother, which I refused to believe, but he swore blind that it was true. Nine hundred years - thank goodness you came along to teach him some sense. What did he do by the way? He left out that part of the story.”
“Kidnapped her for a year!” Jackie replied, pointing to Rose, and River raised an eyebrow. The New Doctor looked uncomfortable.
“Just went off for a few adventures and, you know, meant to leave a 12 hour gap in her time. But the TARDIS... well, it ended up as 12 months.”
“Ah,” River commented drily. “The usual.”
Amy made an odd dismissive sound. “Only twelve months? Consider yourself lucky!”
“Excuse me?” Jackie asked. “And who are you?”
“Amy Pond. Nice to meet you. When I was seven years old he crashed into my garden. To cut a long story short, he promised me to be back in 5 minutes.”
“How long was it then?” Rose asked, curious, and Amy lifted an eyebrow.
“Twelve years!”
“Twelve years?” Jackie repeated, incredulous.
“Look-” the New Doctor cut in, “the TARDIS was breaking apart, the engines were phasing...”
“Twelve years-” Amy said, in the tone of voice that showed that she knew she was going to win the argument, “-and four psychiatrists!”
“Four?” Jackie said, eyes widening, and Rory pulled an embarrassed face.
“She... kept biting them.”
The New Doctor dragged a hand through his hair.
“But we re-wrote time...”
“Still had the psychiatrists, Raggedy Man!” Amy countered.
“You re-wrote time?” Rose’s Doctor cut in, shocked, and the New Doctor beamed.
“Ah yes. The universe was ending so I rebooted it. Big Bang 2! One of my better ideas, if I say so myself!”
“Apart from the part where you erased yourself from existence,” Amy observed, and the New Doctor smiled triumphantly.
“Ah but I had you, didn’t I?” he said, tapping her nose. “The Doctor and Amy Pond, and the days that came after all.”
“You... erased yourself...” Rose’s Doctor echoed, faintly, grasping onto Rose’s hand with more vigour than usual, and the New Doctor opened his arms to encompass them all.
“I did, but it all worked out as you can see. Brilliant story! A fairy tale as a matter of fact. Why don’t we go get a cup of tea and tell you the whole thing?”
“Story time is all well and good Doctor,” Jackie chimed in, “but thanks to you, I’m going to be late for picking up Tony from school.”
She shot the TARDIS a speculative look.
“Unless you wanna give us a lift?”
The New Doctor looked alarmed.
”What? No no no. She needs rest.”
Jackie frowned.
”She who?”
”The TARDIS! We just fell through the Void, and before that-”
Jackie folded her arms. “Oh come on, we’re just picking up one little boy, and not even going anywhere weird, just a few miles down the road. I’ll never make it in the car now, the traffic at this time of day is just atrocious!”
The New Doctor looked torn, but River shook her head and pulled out a TARDIS key.
“Oh stop being difficult, Darling. If it’s that much of a bother I’ll take her.”
Jackie turned to her sharply.
“What? You can fly that thing?”
River just smiled enigmatically and opened the door, and the New Doctor sighed deeply and waved his hand at River.
“Very well. Go on in! I’m coming.”
Head held high in triumph Jackie walked through the door, and then stopped.
“Oh. My. God! You’ve redecorated!”
The New Doctor smirked as she turned around in the doorway, staring at him, but his face fell as she continued.
“Do you think you could do something about my kitchen? I’ve had the builders in for weeks now, and they’re bloody useless! And Himself-” she pointed at Rose’s Doctor, “-just hides and says he doesn’t have the right tools.”
The New Doctor looked like he was trying to find the best way of saying ‘Absolutely not, no way, and also never!’ when River answered.
”Of course he’ll help,” she said, eyeing the New Doctor, eyes dancing. “For a start sonic screwdrivers are just wonderful for putting up shelves!”
Jackie slowly looked from one to the other.
“Listen - are you two married or something?”
For the longest moment no one spoke. The New Doctor was watching River with the most peculiar look on his face - part deer-caught-in-headlights, but (bizarrely) more like he was genuinely curious as to what her answer would be.
Finally River turned back to Jackie.
“It’s... complicated. Let’s just go with ‘Or Something’ for now. But come in and tell me where your son’s school in...”
When the two women had vanished inside, the New Doctor leaned sideways into Rose’s Doctor’s personal space, hands clasped together.
“I feel a sudden urge to apologise profusely for abandoning you here,” he said, and Rose’s Doctor lifted his eyebrows to comical heights.
“Better late than never, I suppose...” he replied, studying the New Doctor cooly, before the familiar devil-may-care smile lit up his face, and he slapped the New Doctor’s back.
“Nah, I’m just kidding. Love it here really. And - you might not know this - but I’ve got a bit of Donna’s voice tucked away, and that can shut up even Jackie Tyler, trust me!”
“Good. Good,” the New Doctor replied, not looking like he was feeling any better at all, and then Jackie stuck her head round the door.
“Look are you coming? Clock’s ticking!”
“It’s a time machine,” the New Doctor complained, shoulders hunched in frustration as he followed her inside, “How many times must I explain it?”
Then, a few seconds after the door had closed, the New Doctor opened it again, searching out Rose’s eyes.
“Rose - be a dear and pop the kettle on? I think I’ll be needing that cuppa a great deal by the time we get back.”
“Um... sure,” she replied, and he gave her happy thumbs up before abruptly rolling his eyes (presumably at something Jackie had said) and shutting the door again, the TARDIS cranking out of existence a moment later.
‘Great. I’m now the Doctor’s Tea Lady,” Rose thought to herself, and tried her best to smile at Amy and Rory. It wasn’t their fault that the Doctor was now a weirdo with a bow tie.
“Um... Doctor?” Rory asked, clearly a little unsure how to address Rose’s Doctor, but looking relieved when the response was an encouraging nod, “I don’t mean to be rude, but... would you mind explaining why there are two of you?”
TBC.
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(Why does Rose still call her Doctor "Doctor"? Didn't he name himself John Noble in your 'verse?)
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And yes, he called himself John Noble (and I'll probably mention that at some point), but partly then is only sorta-kinda the same 'verse, and partly 'Doctor' proved too ingrained to get rid of. (I've got lots of stuff worked out in my mind that I'll never actually write down...)
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And River is just so perfect!
"
”Of course he’ll help,” she said, eyeing the New Doctor, eyes dancing. “For a start sonic screwdrivers are just wonderful for putting up shelves!”"
hahaha
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Isn't it just? It's sort of a guilty pleasure fic, because I am writing it only to please myself, but since lots of others seem to enjoy it too, I don't care! *g*
And River is just so perfect!
Thank you! I ♥ River to infinity! (Have I mentioned how great it is that you watched Doctor Who? *loves sharing multiple fandoms with friends*
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Anyway, fab job! Can't wait to read more. :)
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*beams*
All the banter and wit and clever references back, the fez (in the last chapter) and Jackson Lake and River being so thrilled to meet the one and only Jackie Tyler.
I just throw everything at it... :)
And of course, Rory's question at the end: I knew that was gonna come up eventually!
Yes, it IS a rather pertinent question!
Anyway, fab job! Can't wait to read more. :)
Thank you!!
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And so the truth is about to come out.... or not, who knows, the two of them might just want to skirt around the problem, particularly Eleven. Of course Rory would be the one to ask.
You know, I just KNEW that Eleven would give Jackie some sort of kiss, but I was still ridiculously happy to see it.
Oh god, the mention of Jackson Lake... too bad it lost out on a great comedic moment because clone!Ten had already been created and left behind by then. Made me wonder if Eleven would bother to like... mind meld with him or something to give him a complete set of Ten's memories, or if he'd be reluctant to subject his clone to memories of suppressing Donna's mind and going through that bit of a mental breakdown... ack, more meta from me.
I don't know why but I can't stop grinning at the two of them acting all buddy-buddy. I want more of that. Maybe River can force BOTH of them to fix Jackie's kitchen, at least he wouldn't be alone in pouting about it.
LAWL, Jackie thought she had it tough waiting those twelve months for Rose to return, I'm glad Amy got another chance to rub it in.... and this time the Doctor's put more on a spot because more people are there to be appalled by him (including himself, how mortifying!)
Interesting seeing Ten and Rose being rather... uncomfortable with the idea of the Doctor risking complete erasure from history
Still loving this immensely.
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Rule Number One: The Doctor Always Lies...
You know, I just KNEW that Eleven would give Jackie some sort of kiss, but I was still ridiculously happy to see it.
*grins* (I was actually thinking of that time when she kissed Ten and he wiped it off, looking like a five year old who's been kissed by an aunt and wanted a contrast to that. And Eleven does kiss people!)
Oh god, the mention of Jackson Lake...
Have you seen this vid? :)
too bad it lost out on a great comedic moment because clone!Ten had already been created and left behind by then.
Very true. Honestly I could easily make this fic twenty times longer, just adding in a million references to the past...
Made me wonder if Eleven would bother to like... mind meld with him or something to give him a complete set of Ten's memories, or if he'd be reluctant to subject his clone to memories of suppressing Donna's mind and going through that bit of a mental breakdown... ack, more meta from me.
LOL! You think like me!
I don't know why but I can't stop grinning at the two of them acting all buddy-buddy. I want more of that.
Same here. I'm trying to see how I can fit more in.
Maybe River can force BOTH of them to fix Jackie's kitchen, at least he wouldn't be alone in pouting about it.
Brilliant idea!
LAWL, Jackie thought she had it tough waiting those twelve months for Rose to return, I'm glad Amy got another chance to rub it in.... and this time the Doctor's put more on a spot because more people are there to be appalled by him (including himself, how mortifying!)
Considering how much I love him, I put the poor man on the spot rather a lot...
Interesting seeing Ten and Rose being rather... uncomfortable with the idea of the Doctor risking complete erasure from history
Ten especially!
Still loving this immensely.
Thank you! :D
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*grins* (I was actually thinking of that time when she kissed Ten and he wiped it off, looking like a five year old who's been kissed by an aunt and wanted a contrast to that. And Eleven does kiss people!)
You know, I thought about that as well actually. It's kind of ironic that Ten, who ended up snogging virtually anyone who at came remotely close to being his companion would react that way to Jackie kissing him, whereas Eleven who instantly tore Amy away from himself is so much more open to giving all those friendly pecks of his.
I want him to become more friendly with Jackie than he's ever been and become like the annoying older family member that shoves his nose into the love life of his favorite relatives (i.e Rose and Ten) :D *shot*
About the Jackson Lake video, I hadn't seen that video before and now I have, THAT WAS AWESOME. Thanks for the link. Actually, I think that if Eleven can selectively give his clone more memories, that would be a good one for it.
LOL! You think like me!
I'll take that as a compliment! You have a great mind.
I could easily make this fic twenty times longer, just adding in a million references to the past.
And I wouldn't mind it one bit.
I look forward to the next installment.
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But this is the Whoniverse. What is this 'logic' of which you speak?
Oh, and a thought just occurred to me, Rory and clone!Ten have something in common; both have memories WAY older than that of their physical bodies (Rory having been reborn in the universe reboot and Ten being a clone). Maybe something might come out of that? Ack, sorry, it's your story, you do what you like.
Hee! Interesting idea, but I already have 50 million places I want to go, sorry. *g*
You know, I thought about that as well actually. It's kind of ironic that Ten, who ended up snogging virtually anyone who at came remotely close to being his companion would react that way to Jackie kissing him, whereas Eleven who instantly tore Amy away from himself is so much more open to giving all those friendly pecks of his.
Somehow I think those two facts are related...
I want him to become more friendly with Jackie than he's ever been and become like the annoying older family member that shoves his nose into the love life of his favorite relatives (i.e Rose and Ten) :D *shot*
Would be brilliant, although they're not staying that long...
About the Jackson Lake video, I hadn't seen that video before and now I have, THAT WAS AWESOME. Thanks for the link.
My pleasure! :)
Actually, I think that if Eleven can selectively give his clone more memories, that would be a good one for it.
Absolutely!!!
I'll take that as a compliment! You have a great mind.
Aw, thank you!
And really, I need to run now. Thanks for all your thoughts!
<3
Just... Love it all. Really, I do. Picking up Tony, I LOVE River! And the bit about twelve hours/months/years is hilarious! I had the very same idea the other day, but ended up not writing it and saving it for a later day... Amy VS Rose WIN. <3 So fun.
/grins/ Thank you, Rory, bringer of perspective.
Re: <3
Well there's two Doctors... he just appeared. :)
OH MY GOD! That video is BRILLIANT! So cool! <3 It's like it's a movie trailer or something...
Every. Single. Vid. by
/cackles/ Poor clone!Doctor; not a clue... Shame, really.
I *know*! Poor Ten!Too.
Just... Love it all. Really, I do.
*beams* I loved writing it!
Picking up Tony, I LOVE River!
Heeee! And the domestic undertone to the whole thing made me *way* too happy!
And the bit about twelve hours/months/years is hilarious! I had the very same idea the other day, but ended up not writing it and saving it for a later day...
Once it stuck me I couldn't not use it. ;)
Amy VS Rose WIN. <3 So fun.
It's good that I'm writing it from Rose's POV or she'd come across as rather... grumpy, I think. *g*
/grins/ Thank you, Rory, bringer of perspective.
Indeed. ♥ Rory!
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Anyway, I can't wait to see more. I hope it's okay if I friend you to make sure I don't miss any updates.
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*beams* Thank you!!!
Though now you've got me wondering what, if anything, happened in the parallel universe during the time the Doctor *was* erased. What would that do to his human-TimeLord-biological-metacrisis self?
I DON'T KNOW! Well - if the Doctor never existed then he never met Rose etc, so she'd probably still be a shop girl or something. And then when the Doctor came back they'd all be back again, never realising they'd been gone. I think.
Anyway, I can't wait to see more. I hope it's okay if I friend you to make sure I don't miss any updates.
Oh it's more than OK! Welcome to, and here's a cookie! :)