elisi | THIS IS THE WORST THING

I could feel the bile rising in my throat as soon as she said ''I mix a lot of ingredients''

It's the way it KEEPS GETTING WORSE. :D

Why do I feel the sudden, oddly panicky urge to rush in and swear up and down that this is not a normal American thing? :)

(We do often heat water in the microwave, though. Not me, because I encountered an electric kettle on a trip to Australia, went "WHERE HAS THIS BEEN ALL MY LIFE?" and immediately hunted down one for myself, but I think most Americans are not properly aware of their options in the matter, sadly. If they even drink enough tea to make specialized water-heating equipment seem worthwhile at all.)

Agree, I am horrified. I am horrified by southern sweet tea in general, but omg, heating up iced tea powder in a microwave ... I think that bypasses Limbo/purgatory and puts one straight into like the 7th level of hell.

ETA and yes, the electric kettle is great! I got one for my dad a few years ago and he loves it. He never realized that they have an auto-off functionality once the water boils so he was worried about getting one for a long time.

Edited 2020-05-09 13:26 (UTC)

I think that bypasses Limbo/purgatory and puts one straight into like the 7th level of hell.
*ponders* I'd probably go for the 2nd Circle (The Gluttonous). 7th Circle is Thieves. (Why yes, I am in the middle of reading The Divine Comedy! *g*)

ETA and yes, the electric kettle is great! I got one for my dad a few years ago and he loves it. He never realized that they have an auto-off functionality once the water boils so he was worried about getting one for a long time.
The lack of electric kettles in America is just awful. Like... IDK people still using rotary phones and having to go through to an operator. Am glad you got one for your father, they're fabulous things. <3

Theft of innocence maybe? Or theft of a working insulin system. Good lord. The sugar levels in Tang, powdered lemonade AND iced tea mix are astronomical to begin with. Let's add two more cups of sugar for good measure! My teeth ache just thinking about it.

Yeah, Kettles are just not a thing here. I mean enough households have a teapot, but I'd wager it's mostly either stashed somewhere or used for decoration in country kitchens.

!!! OK, had a closer look, and I worked it out:

Tenth Bolgia of the Eight Circle: Falsifiers, those who attempted to alter things through lies or alchemy, or those who tried to pass off false things as real things, such as counterfeiters of coins, are punished here.

The lack of kettles will never make sense to me. Ditto the lack of eggcups??

how do you make cup a soup or instant noodles without a kettle? such foolishness

Yeah, for the most part people use microwaved boiling water for those things. Those of us enlightened enough to have electric kettles use them though.

It's so WEIRD. Like printing an email and sending it in the post, rather than just pressing 'send'.

that sounds like something Aziraphale would do

Hey, he was the an early adopter of computer technology!!

Mind you, I heard - from my father - of someone who, when they received an email with an attachment would print it off, scan it, and then attach the scan to a new email should he need forward it. He was 'the IT expert' in his office.

I still can't wrap my mind around that.

i

wh

what

I know.

And it's a TRUE STORY, not some sort of shaggy dog tale passed around. Like, my father knew the guy. (My father worked in IT most of his life. He has a lot of stories. But I think that's the most ridiculous one.)

Edited 2020-05-10 12:44 (UTC)

Spot on for the inferno level for sure!

Egg cups are definitely uncommon. Well, I certainly don't own any :D

Edited 2020-05-09 15:45 (UTC)

Spot on for the inferno level for sure!
I was SURE there was something perfect. :)

Egg cups are definitely uncommon. Well, I certainly don't own any :D
But how do you eat boiled eggs??? Sure I don't have eggs daily, but I don't have soup every day either, and I have soup bowls.

/random, not really aimed at you personally

There are plenty of people in the comments saying this too, but British people are certain that no one else knows how to make proper tea.

And - as someone who moved here age 19 - I agree with this. British tea > all other tea.

Re. the issue of kettles then it is BEWILDERING to me that electric kettles are not a thing. Like people still having carriages instead of cars. (I think it's something to do with low voltage in the mains, but even so.)

Yeah, our lower electric voltage means they don't work as fast here as in the UK, but if you're only making a couple of cups' worth, it's still only a few minutes.

Again - BEWILDERING.

Yeah, American, I made it a couple of seconds into the video and was all "We're not all like that!"

Electric kettles really caught on in my family after we found out about them. Even my grandmother who moved into a senior center so she wouldn't have to cook anymore and wanted to get rid of ninety percent of her kitchen equipment decided she could use an electric kettle.

After I bought my electric kettle, my mother decided she really wanted one, too, so I bought one for her, and then she bought one for her mother. I think more Americans would have them, probably, if they knew they were even a thing.

Before that, I was mostly either microwaving water or using a stovetop kettle, which is kind of an annoying thing to do. At one point, my mother tried buying one of these things, which was just... stupid. It seemed like a ridiculously overcomplicated way to make tea, and it wasn't quick. (And, wow, does that article say a lot about tea-drinking in America, I think. OMG.)

Oooh, it's a teasmade: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teasmade

Except without the timing function, which seems an oversight...

I knew instantly which video it had to be, so spared myself the cost of the brain bleach by not watching it again. Under no circumstances should that concoction be called tea, or even tea-adjacent.

I feel like surely it can't be real - but on the other hand this is 2020, so *hands*

I don't even like tea that much, but that is disgusting. All those flavored powders. That isn't tea; it's an abomination.

As for me, in summer I make a giant pot of green tea and chill it, and drink it iced. I quit pop (aka soda) years ago, after a scorching bladder infection. (Sorry, I know, TMI.) Iced tea is my summer go-to drink. No milk, no sugar. It the southern United States it's all "sweet tea." Yuck.

I don't even like tea that much, but that is disgusting. All those flavored powders. That isn't tea; it's an abomination.
It quite literally has no tea in it. :O

As for me, in summer I make a giant pot of green tea and chill it, and drink it iced. I quit pop (aka soda) years ago, after a scorching bladder infection. (Sorry, I know, TMI.) Iced tea is my summer go-to drink. No milk, no sugar. It the southern United States it's all "sweet tea." Yuck.
Cold tea sounds like a sensible thing in summer. And funnily enough in Yorkshire fizzy drinks are known as 'pop'. :)

Here in Minnesota, "pop" is a Midwestern-ism. East coast and west coast call it "soda."

Divided by a common language...

Of course, a Yorkshire colloquialism is referring to water as 'corporation pop'. ;)

Regarding the tea video? That's how Southerners make tea. In the South, if you want iced tea or tea period, you have to say "unsweetened" or they'll put sugar in it and not just a little sugar. They find it tasteless without sugar.

In the North, we don't do it that way. You don't have to ask for "unsweetened" iced tea in New York, you can find it easily. But in South Carolina, Georgia, Virginia, Alabama and the South - they like their tea sweet.

I can tell the woman in the video is from the South, just from listening to her - very thick Southern accent.

Mmm, the accent is very obvious! :D

And the sheer amount of sugar is deadly. Here some people will have sugar, some not. But it tends to be a single teaspoon...

(The main point is of course that there's no tea in what she brewed.)

Well, no there was - instant Lipton tea. It's mentioned briefly at the start - that she has Lipton. It's not very good tea, and has a bitter after-taste. But it's dirt cheap. Which is why it's in all the restaurants, diners, airplanes, etc. You can buy it in bulk for very little. Kind of similar to instant coffee, in a way. There's real coffee in there - it's just been processed. And the caffeine as a result is higher.

Lipton is the tea equivalent of Folgers Instant Coffee - both are very high in caffeine content, and both heavily processed. Also cheap. Very cheap.
The cheaper something is - the more processed and the less good for you.

"Real tea" with actual tea leaves and herbs, or loose tea, is more expensive over here. We do have the tea bags - Twinings which is cheaper, but not quite as cheap as Lipton. And I don't like it as well - prefer the Fair Trade Tea or Choice, or Rishi which is loose tea in a see-through bag.
But Rishi is more expensive. Also matcha - green tea, which is actually better for you.

Natural teas don't come cheap and are harder to get or find in the US. You can find them, but usually in health food stores, or tea shops, not in the grocery store and not via online delivery. And you won't find them in most restaurants or hotels.

I know because I'm a serious tea drinker. I drink tea every day. I have ten different types of tea in my cubicle at work - caffeinated and non-caffeinated and herbal. And have about five different varieties, also various tea bags, and ways to do it.

A lot of Americans are serious tea drinkers - most of the people I work with who are also serious tea drinkers don't touch lipton, and would never drink what is shown in that video.

The people who do drink what she's making aren't really tea drinkers - they prefer coffee, and find tea tastless (I have a co-worker who hates tea and calls it flavored water) and often don't have a lot of money to spend on it or were raised on coffee. Knowing how to brew tea is unfortunately also a class divider in the US. So be careful about this topic.

Well, no there was - instant Lipton tea. It's mentioned briefly at the start - that she has Lipton.
Yeah we have Lipton too, the granule stuff - I don't class it as proper tea. Yes, I'm a snob! *g* But then I got a token from the supermarket to say that I was the No 1 buyer of tea (as in loose leaf tea) of the year, so I feel I have form.

"Real tea" with actual tea leaves and herbs, or loose tea, is more expensive over here. We do have the tea bags - Twinings which is cheaper, but not quite as cheap as Lipton.
Twinings is the cheap option?? Although if you don't have supermarket own brands, I guess it would be. As said, we live off of 'proper, loose tea' but most people just use teabags.

Natural teas don't come cheap and are harder to get or find in the US. You can find them, but usually in health food stores, or tea shops, not in the grocery store and not via online delivery. And you won't find them in most restaurants or hotels.
I feel very sorry for Americans.

I know because I'm a serious tea drinker. I drink tea every day. I have ten different types of tea in my cubicle at work - caffeinated and non-caffeinated and herbal. And have about five different varieties, also various tea bags, and ways to do it.
Sounds like my office. We have a whole drawer full. Although my favourite is Earl Grey.

A lot of Americans are serious tea drinkers - most of the people I work with who are also serious tea drinkers don't touch lipton, and would never drink what is shown in that video.
Gathering by all the Americans reacting in horror - that is quite evident. ;)

they prefer coffee, and find tea tastless (I have a co-worker who hates tea and calls it flavored water)
They should all buy some proper Yorkshire Tea and follow the instructions I linked to. *firm nod*

Knowing how to brew tea is unfortunately also a class divider in the US. So be careful about this topic.
Don't worry, no one in the UK (rightly or wrongly) thinks that Americans know anything about tea. Mind you, the rest of Europe is equally clueless. (And I speak as someone who grew up in another country, who can attest to the fact that British tea is vastly superior to anything brewed elsewhere. Of course, I haven't been to India...) ETA: It's like how people tell me that in America lemonade is A THING, and everyone else does it wrong.

Edited 2020-05-10 17:05 (UTC)

Amusing considering, Britain actually supplies very little tea and the world's tea in fact comes from India and China.

Tea is an aromatic beverage commonly prepared by pouring hot or boiling water over cured leaves of the Camellia sinensis, an evergreen shrub (bush) native to East Asia.[3] After water, it is the most widely consumed drink in the world.[4] There are many different types of tea; some, like Darjeeling and Chinese greens, have a cooling, slightly bitter, and astringent flavour,[5] while others have vastly different profiles that include sweet, nutty, floral or grassy notes. Tea has a stimulating effect in humans primarily due to its caffeine content.[6]

Tea originated in Southwest China during the Shang dynasty, where it was used as a medicinal drink.[7] An early credible record of tea drinking dates to the 3rd century AD, in a medical text written by Hua Tuo.[8] It was popularised as a recreational drink during the Chinese Tang dynasty, and tea drinking spread to other East Asian countries. Portuguese priests and merchants introduced it to Europe during the 16th century.[9] During the 17th century, drinking tea became fashionable among the English, who started large-scale production and commercialisation of the plant in India. Combined, China and India supplied 62% of the world's tea in 2016.

The term herbal tea refers to drinks not made from Camellia sinensis: infusions of fruit, leaves, or other parts of the plant, such as steeps of rosehip, chamomile, or rooibos. These are sometimes[10] called tisanes or herbal infusions to prevent confusion with tea made from the tea plant.

There's also some very good organic teas in the US - Choice Tea - it's organic and fair trade.

And my second go-to brand... Rishi Tea

Rishi can be served hot or cold, which is wonderful and has various brands.

There's also teas that are herbal supplements - such as Blood Sugar tea with mulberry.

And of course.. Harney and Sons

There's many many others. So I think I'll pass on Yorkshire tea.

Edited 2020-05-11 02:19 (UTC)

It's a truth universally known that Britain went around the world beating up other countries and stealing their ~~lunchmoney~~ culture, food & wealth.

There is also the fact that fashions and food changes and evolves. We no longer drink cocoa the way the Aztecs did. So, British tea is now something distinct from elsewhere.

Interestingly, Turkey consumes the most tea per capita (followed by Ireland and the UK.

Anyway, having grown up in Scandinavia, I can attest to the superiority of Proper British Tea. (I have never tried Turkish tea, I might look it up.)

Can't comment on Scandinavian Tea - haven't had it. But Scandinavia isn't really known for tea, Vodka yes, tea, no.

But I just had a cup of British tea - Chai from Twinings of London. Followed by a cup of CBD tea. I am kind of versatile tea drinker. Europe isn't known for its tea. But Asia is - and a lot of the US has adopted the Asian brewing standards - due to the immigrant population from Asia. You haven't had tea until you've had Thai, Vietnamese, Chinese, Indian, and Turkish tea. Also Russian tea is quite good.

Scandinavia isn't known for vodka either, that's Eastern Europe. :)

And the more tea, the better. As long as it's not the horror depicted in the video!

It is here...Karlson's One, Absolute, Findlandia...you are obviously aren't into vodka. ;-)

Cheap vodka is Eastern Europe, the good stuff is Scandinavia.

I REALLY am not. Also I'm Danish, where people drink schnaps. (Proper stuff, 45% proof. Not any kind of liqueurs.)

And I will take that compliment. Scandinavians know how to drink.

Vodka isn't a liqueur - it's the hard stuff. Not sure ...you got that?

Although I've been told Iceland makes the best in the world by my cousins.

I thought you were from the Faro Islands...

I know what vodka is, LOL. But for a lot of people [not from Scandinavia] schnaps is something sweet. I just wanted to point out how Danes they don't drink a particular hard drink (vodka) as they prefer another (schnaps).

And I grew up in the Faroes, but my family is Danish. Plus the Danes and the Faroese like similar drinks. (Beer & schnaps.) (Wine also of course, but.)

Thanks, for the clarification.

Edited 2020-05-12 12:31 (UTC)

I wouldn't say nationality, but culture.

Like how Americans (taken generally) don't have eggcups. British people find this bewildering. On the flipside, then (as I think I mentioned above), then American lemonade is something far superior to what a British person would be familiar with.

You can probably get Yorkshire puddings outside of the UK, but it's unlikely to be a staple part of many people's Sunday dinners etc. Lots of people drink tea. The British & Irish (& Turkish!) drink more than any other country. Ergo, it is a bigger part of the culture.

ETA: You edited whilst I was replying! Anyway, it's not an important thing. :)

Edited 2020-05-12 12:36 (UTC)

I've been irritable lately.

No worries. <3

WTF

Was there any tea leaves in that group of 'ingredients' ? More like a recipe for type 2 diabetes.

There is some Lipton instant (which I don't class as tea). So no. Just a lot of sugar & flavourings.

Ugh Liptons. I've never understood the iced tea thing either.

I even get twitchy about making tea in a mug with a tea bag. We're a teapot family.

Ugh Liptons. I've never understood the iced tea thing either.
I understand it in THEORY. Warm day = cool drink. But it's not something I ever have. (If you want a cool drink, what's wrong with a G&T? *g*)

I even get twitchy about making tea in a mug with a tea bag. We're a teapot family.
SAME HERE. Loose leaf tea. Many pots brewed every day. (We even do our own blend - two parts regular tea, one part Earl Grey.)

V&T for me :)

We're not quite at our own blend yet, I have lots of small pots so when I want Earl grey (usually summertime) I'll make my own pot. Otherwise the fam are strictly breakfast blend.

Cheers!

And I say 'our own blend', what I mean is that we have to tins, one with regular tea and one with Earl Grey, and when making a pot we do two spoons of regular and one of Earl Grey. (Try it!)

At work I tend to just have Earl Grey teabags. :)

The more she added- the more my jaw kept dropping in horror. (though that amount of sugar looks just about correct if she were making southern Sweet Tea.)

The ability to continually making it WORSE was impressive. Horrifying, but impressive.

The amount of sugar makes my toes curl.

I sometimes feel like a bad Southerner just because I can't handle drinking Sweet tea anymore. The high sugar amount started making my head hurt.

I'd definitely say your health is more important!

Also I grew up in the Faroes and like almost NONE of the traditional Faroese foods, so...

Kill it! Kill it with fire!

That is an abomination! I nearly went into diabetic shock watching it but tea it most certainly is not, not even "nearly, but not quite tea", but nothing approaching tea...ever.

I know!! There is NO TEA in there. Quite literally. D:

OMG what a disgusting brew!!!! That's not tea woman!!!!

Sorry, you all had to share my pain...

As a Southerner, I am appalled and disavow this

You are not the only one!

Ummm... Am I mistaken or is there no actual tea in that tea?

No, you are correct. No actual tea.

I feel like there needs to be some kind of PDO for tea!

PDO? (Sorry, my acronym skills have deserted me. I am sure that whatever point you are making is correct.)

Protected Designation of Origin :)

That little red-and-yellow badge which says "this is officially made in Melton Mowbray/France/Greece"

Ooooh. I have learned something today! :D

Oh boy. Gross. I don't mind a little sugar in my tea but I like it to be...mostly...you know...tea.

Not sugar with water & flavourings...

Only from a Southerner... If you knew how much sugar went into sweet tea, which is the default beverage in the South, this would not surprise you.

My reaction to sugary tea of any description:

(Not that that was actually tea. For starters, it didn't contain any actual tea...)

THIS IS THE WORST THING

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