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'Selfless' by OBS (and AOQ)
Here are One Bit Shy’s thoughts on ‘Selfless’. Snippets from AOQ’s original post (that OBS’s responded to) in italics. Enjoy. :)
"I am Aud."
Yes, dear, we know you're odd. That's why we love you so much. (And the
episode purports to claim that Anya doesn't know who she is. Hah! She
declares it outright! -- My personal favorite line of the series.)
----
Well, this is the other big Anya story, so you know I would have a lot to
say...
BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER
Season Seven, Episode 5: "Selfless"
Maybe I should start saying, based on a complete lack of any kind of
evidence, that Joss was heavily involved in writing this one.
Goddard says that this was the first TV script he ever wrote.
After setting things up, act one begins with an extended flashback and
doesn't even bust out its credits until a few minutes later. All in
(presumably genuine) Swedish, it continues the tradition of having
Olaf, and everyone associated with him, talk in flowery and verbose
language. I was certainly entertained. Although these sequences are
pleasant, and give some texture to the central story of Audyanka's
self-perceived lack of identity, they do seem a bit heavy on the
fun:depth ratio considering how much screen time they eat up. That's
not too much of a complaint though; nothing wrong with relaxing and
enjoying the "goods and services" mention,
That's actually a multi-laden line tying into the theme of the episode and,
ultimately, Anya's whole life.
"I can give the excess out to the townspeople, exchanging them not for goods
or services, but for goodwill and the sense of accomplishment that stems
from selflessly giving of yourself to others."
Quite amusing with her later progression to communism and present-day love
for capitalism. But the idea of fulfilment through, "selflessly giving of
yourself to others," isn't socio-economic philosophy. It turns out rather to
be about her own lack of identity - a literal selfless - and finding one's
self through others. Something really nicely handled, I think, by
D'Hoffryn's recognition that she knew her name but didn't know her true
self. Hence, Anyanka is born.
It's funny, but I had always known that Anya was kind of lost in this world,
prone to suggestion, and had staked everything on fulfilment through
Xander. But until this episode, I had never taken the simple step to
recognizing that as her own lack of identity. Duh! One of the multitude of
things about this episode that make it special to me. It's revelatory.
One little thing I like about the choice of the title "Selfless" is that in
spite of Anya's lack of self identity, she is still naturally somewhat
selfish. As a product of her living her life through others she wants them
and their things as her own. Needs them to feel whole herself. Another
way, for example, of looking at her desire to have all of Buffy's presents
as her own back in Older and Far Away as she imagines being Buffy, basking
in the love. Examples abound throughout her time in BtVS, which all could
be reconsidered in this light. Most obviously, of course, being the way she
clung to Xander.
The idea of a woman losing her identity by living it through a man is also
one of the core concepts of the feminist movement as exemplified by Betty
Friedan's, the Feminine Mystique. This episode (and Anya's whole arc)
doesn't go there terribly overtly, which I appreciate. It's not a feminist
tract. But my instincts strongly suggest that it was something very much on
Joss's mind even if it may not have been directly stated. Another example
of how the series often comes from a feminist frame of reference without
being about feminism. It's one of the ways to look at Anya's life, but it's
still Anya's personal story. One that isn't sacrificed on the altar of
ideology. Indeed, Xander ends up as the good guy here as we all realize
that Anya could never have made the choice she did had Xander not entered
her life.
and logic that is
"insane and happenstance, like that of a troll." And "the troll
is doing an Olaf impersonation! Hit him with fruits and various
meats!" And so on and on and on. It also momentarily seems like
we'll get an explanation for the ubiquitous rabbit jokes, but are
granted only hints.
I've always taken it as sufficient explanation in itself. An association
with her original ruined dream that sent her down the vengeance path. A
kind of psychological transference of her fear of rejection. Granted, the
vengeance is the greater psychopathic response. But it's all part of her
avoidance of examining her own life.
The later Russian Revolution scene is worth
having, to make the theme of Anya's journey a little more blatant
with the "what else is there?" conversation,
I'm not certain what theme you refer to there. There's the stated
"selfless" theme of lack of identity. And you do have her working a job
self-defined as manifesting the desires of others. "It's all inside the
girl. I just bring it out." Along with the money line, "Vengeance is what I
am." Kind of defining herself by her job. But I don't have anything more
to say about that theme, except how it manifests at the end of the episode.
There are other things about this scene that strike me too. Starting, I
guess, with the more disturbing possibility that, "Vengeance is what I am,"
could really be (or at least have been) her true self. D'Hoffryn thought
so, and I wouldn't discount his expertise on the subject. If you consider
what we've all been saying about the dark side of Willow being a major part
of her, then D'Hoffryn's evaluation of Willow's potential isn't wrong. One
of the most striking bits of dialog for me is back in the second Sjornjost
scene.
D'Hoffryn: I get the sense that your talents are not fully appreciated here,
Anyanka. We'd like you to join us.
Anya: Why do you keep calling me that? My name is Aud.
D'Hoffryn: Perhaps, but Anyanka is who you are.
Anya: What would I have to do?
D'Hoffryn: What you do best. Help wronged women punish evil men.
Anya: Vengeance.
D'Hoffryn: But only to those who deserve it.
Anya: They all deserve it.
D'Hoffryn: That's where I was going with that, yeah.
Anya is actually a step ahead of D'Hoffryn by the end of the conversation
and requires no convincing to join him. It comes across like a calling for
her. In the St. Petersburg scene we see the vengeance demon in full flower.
And she's good at it. Halfrek saying, "I'm in awe of you," isn't just
fawning.
Chris raises an issue later in the discussion that I've heard a few times,
but don't really agree with. That being the realization that her
personality predates her demon life. That it couldn't be written off as the
amusing lapses of an ex-demon learning how to be human. Aside from
confusing manner with content, it misunderstands the core revelatory element
of the episode. Namely that her failure was always a human one. Vengeance
was already what she was when D'Hoffryn showed up. The only thing making
her a demon did was give her the power to shine at it.
To me, the biggest point of the St. Petersburg scene was to show that she
wasn't different as a demon. The same obsessive focus. The same quirky
logic. The same motivation she had as a human. Time and power allowed her
to develop her vengeance into an art - and make her content. But being a
demon doesn't change her.
Which we see a second time when she becomes a demon again. This time it
doesn't work the same way. Why? Because Xander changed her while she was
human. Becoming a demon doesn't undo that. The demon doesn't change her.
Never did.
This is a big reason that Anya's story fascinates me so much. I've
commented before how many parallels there are between her journey and
Spike's journey. They're very strong and don't go away. But there are huge
differences as well. Spike's story (Angel's and Darla's too for that
matter) has roots in his human self. But it's still essentially one of a
demon's redemption. He was born as something new when he became a vampire
and must regain his soul to become an (undead)man. Anya never lost her
soul. It wasn't the demon that unmade her. All that time that we had the
parallel of Xander teaching Anya to be human while Buffy was teaching the
same to Spike, Anya actually was human while Spike wasn't.
For this purpose, the better parallel turns out to be Willow. (Continuing
the BtVS sport of never ending parallels.) It's no accident that Willow
suddenly is Anya's helper, the only one who really identifies with her
predicament. Going back to STSP, in the kind of sexy conversation, Willow
summed up Anya's feelings in a way that Anya was surprised to find she
really identified with. But that summation was all about power. Nothing at
all about demon. Power run amok when handed to one's base instincts.
Willow understands that. And the frat house is disturbingly familiar to
her. She remembers every second of Warren's flaying.
There's another part to their parallel that I think is interesting. Willow
always had a spark of humanity in her - the thing that Xander drew upon to
save her last season. Anya, not so much - until Xander came into her life
and gave her his. (Anya gave a lot to him too, but that's not this
subject.) So, yes, the other parallel is Xander, who is in his way the
salvation of both. Perhaps a salvation more alike than it first seems. The
yellow crayon story, for example, isn't just a memory of what Willow once
was like. Implicit in the tale is that Xander is the guy who cared that
Willow was crying. Xander meant something to Willow in a fashion not so
different from Anya. I would suggest that they had both loved him for
pretty much the same reason - his heart. Which may add a little tone to
Triangle.
Getting back to St. Petersburg. The last thing I want to observe about that
scene is how totally obsessive she is about her vengeance calling. All else
is excluded. Even a little bit of fun at watching the razing of the Winter
Mansion. (Mansion?) Halfrek speaks of a whole world out there, but it
doesn't interest Anya. Implied in this is Anya's lack of feeling. (This is
the part of the conversation that the burning man appears without attracting
even their notice.) By that, I don't just mean cruel uncaring. I mean she
has denied herself the senses of life. It's all vengeance, and that's the
only thing she draws satisfaction from.
I mention that because of how that alone would disorient her when returned
to human state. And it did. A little flashback to S3's The Prom...
Anya: You know, you can laugh, but I have witnessed a millennium of
treachery and oppression from the males of the species and I have nothing
but contempt for the whole libidinous lot of them.
Xander: Then why you talking to me?
Anya: I don't have a date for the prom.
Xander: Well gosh. I wonder why not. It couldn't possibly have anything to
do with your sales pitch?
Anya: Men are evil. Will you go with me?
Xander: One of us is very confused, and I honestly don't know which.
Anya: You know, this happens to be all your fault.
Xander: My fault?
Anya: You were unfaithful to Cordelia so I took on the guise of a
twelfth-grader to tempt her with the Wish. When I lost my powers I got stuck
in this persona, and now I have all these feelings. I don't understand it. I
don't like it. All I know is I really want to go to this dance and I want
someone to go with me.
Late S3 and early S4 Anya was, well, a little crazy. After a thousand odd
years of repressing her feelings, she had a hell of a time coping with them.
Again, not so much because of anything the demon did to her, but because
she'd lost her single purpose and was left with nothing but all the stuff
she'd shut out - plus a good dose of teenage hormones. I appreciate how
what we see now supports what we saw then. I doubt this particular
connection was on the writer's mind, but it demonstrates to me the unity of
the construct. Which kind of surprises me since I think an ongoing Anya was
initially a hurried construct at the end of S3.
What also connects nicely for me is how Xander very quickly rejects Anya in
Graduation Day, but not like Olaf or the way any of the multitude of
vengeance wishers had related to Anya. In Xander's words, "I got friends on
the line." Somehow Xander managed to merge Anya's essential fear of
rejection with his first lesson in humanity - making Xander the object of
both hope and fear for Anya, and starting her down the path that went
through Hells Bells to here. I marvel now looking back at how well the
start fits what came.
What a strange path. She became demon to better express her human desires.
Had to return to human to find the humanity she missed the first time
around. But had to return to demon to understand her humanity.
and to emphasize the
depths of bloodiness in her past. Plus seeing that she wasn't always
such a fan of capitalism. Also worth noting that the second chunk of
the Scandinavian story finally solves one of things I'd been
wondering about (and thought of as a plot hole) - how Aud turned Olaf
into a troll even though vengeance demons can't invoke vengeance on
behalf of themselves. Magic. Like Willow (almost) in "Wild At
Heart." Okay.
Amusing moment I'm fond of...
Anya: A load bearing bar matron.
D'Hoffryn: Is there any other kind?
Willow, kinda standing outside the center of the action, triggers a few
of its central plot points. The first comes with her interactions with
Anya, quickly figuring out that the latter isn't a good liar. Even
if one ignores her slow-moving conscience, Anya couldn't have hidden
what she'd done for long. It's exciting to see Wil her back on top
of things, with the casual way she deflects the spider attack. And of
course stuck in there is a little reminder of how thin the line is
between the fun, cuddly character she wants to be and the contemptuous
and violent individual that's also part of whom she is. Naturally,
she has to be the first one of the group to try to reach out to Anya
and help her get over the mass-murder; that's the way such things
work in the Buffyverse.
I've already brought up the Willow/Anya parallel. Just wanted to add how
nice it is that Willow's impulse is to help Anya. And how using D'Hoffryn's
talisman the way she does represents, finally, a little real atonement for
Something Blue. She found something good to get out of the experience - and
along the way implicitly rejected D'Hoffryn a second time. This time with a
much fuller understanding of what that means. Good for her.
I feel a little strange giving fashion updates, but hey, I noticed
these things: first, Willow's dressing the way Buffy might have in
the show's early days, and second, the workmanlike jeans-and-T-shirt
look is working well for Xander.
Anya's outfit at the end isn't much of a fashion statement, but damn, I
found it hot. Or maybe it's just her with a sword.
This episode is about all of the four main Scoobies, and not so much
anyone else (Trachtenberg's appearance is more or less just so they
can say she appeared).
But long enough to throw in a theme related line. "She(Anya) should try
acting like everybody else more." The episode sure isn't shy about theme
references. My favorite is in the song. "Mrs. Anya
Lame-Ass-Made-Up-Maiden-Name Harris." Funny, but still pointed at lack of
identity.
Spike's cameo is an interesting little scene,
at least. Turning to Buffy for someone to talk to about his insanity
is appropriate both from character and "let's drawing parallels
with last year!!" perspectives. And before the reveal of the
fake-out, I actually did wonder whether she was going nuts with the
sympathy and forgiveness as a response to the end of "Help."
As did I - and still do on repeated view. One of those moments that I
continually forget until the payoff.
So there's a bout of spider-killing, itself an enjoyable battle,
It's a wonderful battle. So different from the norm that it feels really
fresh. Buffy throwing the axe up into the tree is way cool. It's rather a
mark of how good this episode is that it gets buried as just another scene.
which leads into one of those ever-popular scenes in which our friends
get to sit around yelling at each other. And it just may be the best
one yet. Buffy is back on her game as the Slayer. Xander's appeals
all come from the heart, but it leads him to bring the past into play
in a simultaneously funny and moving manner: "This isn't new ground
for us. When our friends go all crazy and start killing people, we
help them." "Sitting right here!" It's wonderful the way
Buffy steers the conversation and keeps it about necessity, showing
gradually escalating annoyance but keeping it under control... and
unloads from time to time with one or two yelled lines when it becomes
too much, then makes herself calm down a little. It's the
combination of Xander's somewhat fair issues with being shut out, and
monstrously unfair accusations of being an uncaring killer that trigger
her "I KILLED ANGEL!" explosion. And finally, after all these
years, Buffy calls Xander to task for The Lie...
No indication that Buffy recognized it as a lie. Xander doesn't admit it.
Willow knows that it's not true, but she wasn't there and may not be sure
why the story came out as it did. In the meantime that gets pushed aside
because Willow has her own problem with Buffy now because she won't go with
her even though Buffy clearly wants her to. Willow makes up for this by
calling D'Hoffryn, but I don't think that really settles that little
disconnect. One more nuance to add to the scene.
but it's not just
for the sake of beating him up over it, it's in the name of proving a
point - "it is always 'different!' It's always
complicated."
I wanted to say something about Scythe's post last espisode and it's
relationship to here, but I'm writing too much as it is. Suffice to say
that the whole, "I am the law," bit is a big deal. (Not just for that
sentence.) However, assuming I'm right about where Scythe is going with
that, I'm not so convinced any of it should be all that evident to you at
this point. Things connect. And, you know, that's not exactly news by this
point in BtVS.
As in "Villains," when she was almost arguing the
opposite side, Buffy emerges as the voice of reason, and the others
can't deny that she makes sense, even if they can't be part of her
fight. That conversation ends with Brendon's delivery on "there
has to be another way" suggesting that he sees that, and Buffy's
convincing and earnest "then please find it." Ye gods, what a
great scene.
The commentary speaks of being sympathetic to all sides. Which is so true.
Xander is showing many of his old Xander elements here, but more than ever
you can't fault him. Indeed, I would say that it's kind of his
responsibility to take the stance he does. Yeah, maybe Buffy did stab Angel
in the end. But it took a long time to get her there, and Xander isn't a
slayer.
One more thing in that scene that I like, (so many nuances) is how atuned
to each other Buffy and Willow are. Not in the sense of exactly agreeing,
but in knowing what each other are thinking. Willow knows Buffy has to kill
Anya. Buffy knows that's why Willow held back telling them. I don't think
we've seen this understanding between them since S5, though there was a sign
of it re-emerging in Entropy when Willow realized that something was up
between Buffy and Spike. I guess helping Willow heal a couple episodes ago
made a difference.
Things then travel to Anya's side, and Xander's continued attempt
to get through to her with his world-saving mouth. Caulfield is at her
best here, with the rest of the cast not far behind. It's odd and
fascinating the way she almost identifies with Buffy as a fellow
supernatural creature who knows what her job "should" be, and then
how she turns on the anger once said Slayer actually appears. Both
segments of the fight are exciting, almost rivaling some of the other
times Buffy's had to face off with a former friend.
I love the action and drama of this. Very sharp. And, yes, recognizing the
inevitability of the showdown is good. (Anya is also someone who has always
taken great pride in doing a job right. I think she might even be insulted
if Buffy didn't approach her with slaying in mind.)
There is some discussion about when/if Anya was resigned to death, and the
metaphorical slaying of the demon.
I think it's pretty clear that she was accepting death when sprawled on the
floor with Buffy above her, sword raised. Fortunately, Xander wasn't so
accepting. I assume the idea was simply Xander saving Anya when he had the
chance. But I've always harbored this notion that he saw Anya give up then
and knew it meant she really was worth saving.
A metaphorical slaying does come with the first impaling. You can tell,
because she's no longer in demon face after. What exactly that means I'm
not certain. Anya continued fighting. Perhaps it's something to do with
mentally letting go of all that history we've seen in flashback. I don't
know. In the real end of the episode she does seem to know there's no going
back and that she's on her own.
As for the idea that she was looking for death all along, I'm more
ambivalent about that. I think it's more that she's on a brink and has to
choose. (D'Hoffryn's solution not yet thought of.) But hasn't yet.
There's a lot of rage here and a lot of her that at least wants to defend
her lifetime of vengeance - pride still coming through. (Here I do still
relate to the Spike parallel and his anger at the chip preventing him from
being a monster and hating to have to make the choice he must.) Anya's
horror and misgivings about what she has done throughout this episode have
been alternated with an angry justification of the deed to Xander, an
equally angry reminder of Warren's flaying to Willow (both of their efforts
to help failing), and turning to Halfrek for encouragement. Halfrek's
efforts are inadequate, but she *is* encouraging to Anya none the less.
So I tend to think it hung in the balance until the final flashback. In my
internal imagining of this, the thing that turns it, makes Anya's mind up in
the end, is Xander asleep in the chair during the musical number. It's the
sleep of the innocent moment when Xander becomes the total lovable lunk.
And Anya loses all her heart for vengeance. She certainly can't be
motivated by Olaf anymore. And the wedding fiasco stops being enough.
("Sooner or later, Anya, that excuse just stops working." - from Beneath
You) Xander gave her too much over three years to support vengeance. (Anya
to Xander at the end - "Thanks. For everything.")
Just another love story.
One of the episode's most unorthodox moments comes when Anya is
abruptly stabbed through the heart to close act three. My eyes popped
wide open there. And then act four spends like three minutes taking us
back to Sunnydale, 2001. Can't say I saw that coming. It's
strange and maybe gimmicky, but given that it would work so well as
either a eulogy or a restatement of theme en route to her surviving,
good on it. I don't like having to be reminded of dumb things like
the end of "Hell's Bells" and the source of the spell in OMWF,
both of which are part of this episode, but such are the perils of
serialized TV.
What's wrong with that? *g*
I think they had in mind recalling something iconic to emphasize how tied in
to Xander she was. According to the commentary, they had toyed with the
idea of recalling Hush, but decided the silent approach wouldn't work so
well in this episode. So Goddard had the gumption to ask Joss to write a
new song - and got his wish in a day.
I don't actually like the song all that much. Kind of clunky. But it gets
its point across well, better I think than the Hush idea would have. And
wedding dress to sword in chest... Phew! That's some transition.
If anyone cares, I didn't notice the mustard until I saw it on the
transcript, but that's pretty funny. And speaking of dumb but funny,
"oh, breathtaking. It's like somebody slaughtered an Abercrombie &
Fitch catalog."
I like the mustard bit - which is nice, 'cause that's the one number in OMWF
that I hated.
D'Hoffryn's line is priceless - as is his whole performance. Almost makes
me wish he'd been a regular, though I don't think he's the kind of demon
Buffy would have wanted to face.
Meanwhile, seems like every plot thread of "Selfless" is heavily
tied to the past. That amulet that Willow's had for the past three
years comes into play as she takes it upon herself to have another chat
with D'Hoffryn. (And keep in mind, Willow + strong magic, especially
in the name of helping friends + evil impulses = potentially bad, which
is perhaps why the "shut your whimpering mouth!" scene is in this
episode. And which makes the callback to "Something Blue" seem
even more appropriate. "Selfless" is put together so well.)
Everyone's favorite demon patriarch may be a dick, but he's also
the one to remind everyone that Anya has her own existence
independently of everyone else (or should), and should thus be the one
to decide whether her vengeance can be undone.
About D'Hoffryn. Yes, he's one mean SOB. Arguably the most powerful and
truly destructive demon over time we've seen on the series. Even so, he
seems to work within some kind of controlled framework with its own weird
ethics - albeit ones that don't preclude maximum pain. I really like how
his conclusion with Anya comes in the form of a wish.
Also, I think D'Hoffryn's anger with Anya is his version of hurt. Not that
I want to remind you of Hell's Bells again (oh, hell, of course I do), but
he showed what sure looked like genuine affection for Anya then. And
Halfrek insinuated that Anya was D'Hoffryn's favorite. I think he's lashing
back at Anya for rejecting him - which is a pretty neat transferance of the
rejection theme in Anya's life. Here, Anya does the rejecting, and in the
process leaves that part of her behind.
That leads into a second attempt to make the viewer think that she
might die. At this point, I was suspecting that if the show wanted to
kill Anya, it'd have done so already, so I was all prepared to get
annoyed over all this buildup and misdirection for nothing. As it
turns out, Anya lives, and the buildup isn't for nothing at all.
D'Hoffryn echoes a Mutant Enemy writer's credo: "never go for the
kill when you can go for the pain." And throw in another reference
to the "beneath you it devours" thing for good measure, just to add
to the sense of rising action tying together the individual episodes of
early S7. I love this show. Even when trying to atone, Anya's a
killer. Death is too easy a redemption in the Buffyverse. Never much
cared for the character of Hallie, so it's a double blessing to see
her death used so effectively.
I liked Halfrek. A lot, actually. I think she may be the most effective
symbollic character ever on BtVS. (Offhand I can't think of anyone else
quite like her.) Essentially she is Anya. Her function from the start was
to remind Anya, us, everybody what being a vengeance demon really means.
And especially to remind us that Anya had never gotten rid of that within
herself. Her death here I think is more the metaphoric death of Anya's
demon than was the sword through the chest. She also served the practical
function of having previously established that a sword through the chest
doesn't kill vengeance demons.
Regarding Xander's final exchange with Anya: "Xander - what if
I'm really nobody?" "Don't be a dope." Such a sweet insult.
You know what that reminds me of? It's ROT13ed for those who for
some reason still haven't seen _Firefly_. Ohg ng gur raq bs
"Freravgl" (gur rcvfbqr), Fvzba erfcbaqf gb Evire'f tengvghqr naq
qvforyvrs gung ur'q or noyr gb fnir ure jvgu "lbh'er n qhzzl;"
clearly not true, but it somehow conveys more affection than a more
straightforward declaration of love would. Well, same thing here.
I like how it continues after that.
Anya: I'm a dope.
Xander: Sometimes.
Anya: That's a start.
One final return to the theme of no identity with Anya finally saying she
has to make herself.
Xander is very sweet here, especially since it comes right on the heels of
Anya's thanks for everything - a thanks delivered with a finality that tells
Xander that it's really over. Watching Xander wilt right then is heart
breaking. And just in case you missed the point, the episode closes with
the two walking away from each other.
Just another love story.
So...
One-sentence summary: An episode for all seasons.
AOQ rating: SUPERLATIVE
I think (we'll see) that there is another episode this season that I would
find objectively better than this. But the hell with objectively. This one
matters more to me. Even though her story is smaller than some, it is for
me second only to Buffy's story for its impact. (Yes, more than Spike's or
Willow's stories.) And this culmination of her journey thrills me. In some
ways Anya was a worse demon than the vampires we know. And she lacked the
excuse of no soul that they had. She chose her course more thoroughly than
they did. But when she finally came to understand her humanity she also
finally chose that though it meant her life to do so. (She believed.) I
especially love how she had to become a demon again to understand her
humanity - as it taught her the truth of her demon way.
It's also a great love story, so very different from most we've seen here.
There's a sadness to it, but it's not tragic. Xander and Anya had their
love - in full - and it was wonderful and transforming. Especially for
Anya. Something that's now passed, but not lost.
Going back to the Willow parallel for a moment, Willow went through her life
recklessly grasping at magical power until she ran into power too big for
her and was nearly brought down by it. Anya grasped perhaps more recklessly
than Willow, and was corrupted practically from the start. "My whole life,
I've just clung to whatever came along." But with Anya, what she eventually
ran into was Xander. And true love. It brought her down too. To humanity.
I was thinking about the little to do about my remark about a woman changing
her man - referring to Buffy and Spike. Here we have the reverse of the man
changing the woman. But just as with Spike, in the end only Anya could
change herself. Xander may have shown the way - a tremendous gift - but
it's still up to Anya to go there. This is why they can't be together. And
why Xander leaving her at the altar doesn't matter anymore - was the right
thing to do even though he didn't understand why. Anya can't depend on
Xander - anyone - that way again. That's the Anya that became a vengeance
demon. One way or the other she has to craft herself now. It's a kind of
Annie Hall story. (As weird as it is to bring Woody Allen into this.) The
thing that makes their love special is the thing that requires it to end.
Anya's not the same person anymore. What Xander provided and she needed so
badly can only be in the way now.
I don't quite know how to fit Superlative into your system, so I'm leaving
my rating as Excellent. This is currently sitting #8 all time, but I'm
still in the process of constructing a top ten. It might shift around a
little.
OBS
"I am Aud."
Yes, dear, we know you're odd. That's why we love you so much. (And the
episode purports to claim that Anya doesn't know who she is. Hah! She
declares it outright! -- My personal favorite line of the series.)
----
Well, this is the other big Anya story, so you know I would have a lot to
say...
BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER
Season Seven, Episode 5: "Selfless"
Maybe I should start saying, based on a complete lack of any kind of
evidence, that Joss was heavily involved in writing this one.
Goddard says that this was the first TV script he ever wrote.
After setting things up, act one begins with an extended flashback and
doesn't even bust out its credits until a few minutes later. All in
(presumably genuine) Swedish, it continues the tradition of having
Olaf, and everyone associated with him, talk in flowery and verbose
language. I was certainly entertained. Although these sequences are
pleasant, and give some texture to the central story of Audyanka's
self-perceived lack of identity, they do seem a bit heavy on the
fun:depth ratio considering how much screen time they eat up. That's
not too much of a complaint though; nothing wrong with relaxing and
enjoying the "goods and services" mention,
That's actually a multi-laden line tying into the theme of the episode and,
ultimately, Anya's whole life.
"I can give the excess out to the townspeople, exchanging them not for goods
or services, but for goodwill and the sense of accomplishment that stems
from selflessly giving of yourself to others."
Quite amusing with her later progression to communism and present-day love
for capitalism. But the idea of fulfilment through, "selflessly giving of
yourself to others," isn't socio-economic philosophy. It turns out rather to
be about her own lack of identity - a literal selfless - and finding one's
self through others. Something really nicely handled, I think, by
D'Hoffryn's recognition that she knew her name but didn't know her true
self. Hence, Anyanka is born.
It's funny, but I had always known that Anya was kind of lost in this world,
prone to suggestion, and had staked everything on fulfilment through
Xander. But until this episode, I had never taken the simple step to
recognizing that as her own lack of identity. Duh! One of the multitude of
things about this episode that make it special to me. It's revelatory.
One little thing I like about the choice of the title "Selfless" is that in
spite of Anya's lack of self identity, she is still naturally somewhat
selfish. As a product of her living her life through others she wants them
and their things as her own. Needs them to feel whole herself. Another
way, for example, of looking at her desire to have all of Buffy's presents
as her own back in Older and Far Away as she imagines being Buffy, basking
in the love. Examples abound throughout her time in BtVS, which all could
be reconsidered in this light. Most obviously, of course, being the way she
clung to Xander.
The idea of a woman losing her identity by living it through a man is also
one of the core concepts of the feminist movement as exemplified by Betty
Friedan's, the Feminine Mystique. This episode (and Anya's whole arc)
doesn't go there terribly overtly, which I appreciate. It's not a feminist
tract. But my instincts strongly suggest that it was something very much on
Joss's mind even if it may not have been directly stated. Another example
of how the series often comes from a feminist frame of reference without
being about feminism. It's one of the ways to look at Anya's life, but it's
still Anya's personal story. One that isn't sacrificed on the altar of
ideology. Indeed, Xander ends up as the good guy here as we all realize
that Anya could never have made the choice she did had Xander not entered
her life.
and logic that is
"insane and happenstance, like that of a troll." And "the troll
is doing an Olaf impersonation! Hit him with fruits and various
meats!" And so on and on and on. It also momentarily seems like
we'll get an explanation for the ubiquitous rabbit jokes, but are
granted only hints.
I've always taken it as sufficient explanation in itself. An association
with her original ruined dream that sent her down the vengeance path. A
kind of psychological transference of her fear of rejection. Granted, the
vengeance is the greater psychopathic response. But it's all part of her
avoidance of examining her own life.
The later Russian Revolution scene is worth
having, to make the theme of Anya's journey a little more blatant
with the "what else is there?" conversation,
I'm not certain what theme you refer to there. There's the stated
"selfless" theme of lack of identity. And you do have her working a job
self-defined as manifesting the desires of others. "It's all inside the
girl. I just bring it out." Along with the money line, "Vengeance is what I
am." Kind of defining herself by her job. But I don't have anything more
to say about that theme, except how it manifests at the end of the episode.
There are other things about this scene that strike me too. Starting, I
guess, with the more disturbing possibility that, "Vengeance is what I am,"
could really be (or at least have been) her true self. D'Hoffryn thought
so, and I wouldn't discount his expertise on the subject. If you consider
what we've all been saying about the dark side of Willow being a major part
of her, then D'Hoffryn's evaluation of Willow's potential isn't wrong. One
of the most striking bits of dialog for me is back in the second Sjornjost
scene.
D'Hoffryn: I get the sense that your talents are not fully appreciated here,
Anyanka. We'd like you to join us.
Anya: Why do you keep calling me that? My name is Aud.
D'Hoffryn: Perhaps, but Anyanka is who you are.
Anya: What would I have to do?
D'Hoffryn: What you do best. Help wronged women punish evil men.
Anya: Vengeance.
D'Hoffryn: But only to those who deserve it.
Anya: They all deserve it.
D'Hoffryn: That's where I was going with that, yeah.
Anya is actually a step ahead of D'Hoffryn by the end of the conversation
and requires no convincing to join him. It comes across like a calling for
her. In the St. Petersburg scene we see the vengeance demon in full flower.
And she's good at it. Halfrek saying, "I'm in awe of you," isn't just
fawning.
Chris raises an issue later in the discussion that I've heard a few times,
but don't really agree with. That being the realization that her
personality predates her demon life. That it couldn't be written off as the
amusing lapses of an ex-demon learning how to be human. Aside from
confusing manner with content, it misunderstands the core revelatory element
of the episode. Namely that her failure was always a human one. Vengeance
was already what she was when D'Hoffryn showed up. The only thing making
her a demon did was give her the power to shine at it.
To me, the biggest point of the St. Petersburg scene was to show that she
wasn't different as a demon. The same obsessive focus. The same quirky
logic. The same motivation she had as a human. Time and power allowed her
to develop her vengeance into an art - and make her content. But being a
demon doesn't change her.
Which we see a second time when she becomes a demon again. This time it
doesn't work the same way. Why? Because Xander changed her while she was
human. Becoming a demon doesn't undo that. The demon doesn't change her.
Never did.
This is a big reason that Anya's story fascinates me so much. I've
commented before how many parallels there are between her journey and
Spike's journey. They're very strong and don't go away. But there are huge
differences as well. Spike's story (Angel's and Darla's too for that
matter) has roots in his human self. But it's still essentially one of a
demon's redemption. He was born as something new when he became a vampire
and must regain his soul to become an (undead)man. Anya never lost her
soul. It wasn't the demon that unmade her. All that time that we had the
parallel of Xander teaching Anya to be human while Buffy was teaching the
same to Spike, Anya actually was human while Spike wasn't.
For this purpose, the better parallel turns out to be Willow. (Continuing
the BtVS sport of never ending parallels.) It's no accident that Willow
suddenly is Anya's helper, the only one who really identifies with her
predicament. Going back to STSP, in the kind of sexy conversation, Willow
summed up Anya's feelings in a way that Anya was surprised to find she
really identified with. But that summation was all about power. Nothing at
all about demon. Power run amok when handed to one's base instincts.
Willow understands that. And the frat house is disturbingly familiar to
her. She remembers every second of Warren's flaying.
There's another part to their parallel that I think is interesting. Willow
always had a spark of humanity in her - the thing that Xander drew upon to
save her last season. Anya, not so much - until Xander came into her life
and gave her his. (Anya gave a lot to him too, but that's not this
subject.) So, yes, the other parallel is Xander, who is in his way the
salvation of both. Perhaps a salvation more alike than it first seems. The
yellow crayon story, for example, isn't just a memory of what Willow once
was like. Implicit in the tale is that Xander is the guy who cared that
Willow was crying. Xander meant something to Willow in a fashion not so
different from Anya. I would suggest that they had both loved him for
pretty much the same reason - his heart. Which may add a little tone to
Triangle.
Getting back to St. Petersburg. The last thing I want to observe about that
scene is how totally obsessive she is about her vengeance calling. All else
is excluded. Even a little bit of fun at watching the razing of the Winter
Mansion. (Mansion?) Halfrek speaks of a whole world out there, but it
doesn't interest Anya. Implied in this is Anya's lack of feeling. (This is
the part of the conversation that the burning man appears without attracting
even their notice.) By that, I don't just mean cruel uncaring. I mean she
has denied herself the senses of life. It's all vengeance, and that's the
only thing she draws satisfaction from.
I mention that because of how that alone would disorient her when returned
to human state. And it did. A little flashback to S3's The Prom...
Anya: You know, you can laugh, but I have witnessed a millennium of
treachery and oppression from the males of the species and I have nothing
but contempt for the whole libidinous lot of them.
Xander: Then why you talking to me?
Anya: I don't have a date for the prom.
Xander: Well gosh. I wonder why not. It couldn't possibly have anything to
do with your sales pitch?
Anya: Men are evil. Will you go with me?
Xander: One of us is very confused, and I honestly don't know which.
Anya: You know, this happens to be all your fault.
Xander: My fault?
Anya: You were unfaithful to Cordelia so I took on the guise of a
twelfth-grader to tempt her with the Wish. When I lost my powers I got stuck
in this persona, and now I have all these feelings. I don't understand it. I
don't like it. All I know is I really want to go to this dance and I want
someone to go with me.
Late S3 and early S4 Anya was, well, a little crazy. After a thousand odd
years of repressing her feelings, she had a hell of a time coping with them.
Again, not so much because of anything the demon did to her, but because
she'd lost her single purpose and was left with nothing but all the stuff
she'd shut out - plus a good dose of teenage hormones. I appreciate how
what we see now supports what we saw then. I doubt this particular
connection was on the writer's mind, but it demonstrates to me the unity of
the construct. Which kind of surprises me since I think an ongoing Anya was
initially a hurried construct at the end of S3.
What also connects nicely for me is how Xander very quickly rejects Anya in
Graduation Day, but not like Olaf or the way any of the multitude of
vengeance wishers had related to Anya. In Xander's words, "I got friends on
the line." Somehow Xander managed to merge Anya's essential fear of
rejection with his first lesson in humanity - making Xander the object of
both hope and fear for Anya, and starting her down the path that went
through Hells Bells to here. I marvel now looking back at how well the
start fits what came.
What a strange path. She became demon to better express her human desires.
Had to return to human to find the humanity she missed the first time
around. But had to return to demon to understand her humanity.
and to emphasize the
depths of bloodiness in her past. Plus seeing that she wasn't always
such a fan of capitalism. Also worth noting that the second chunk of
the Scandinavian story finally solves one of things I'd been
wondering about (and thought of as a plot hole) - how Aud turned Olaf
into a troll even though vengeance demons can't invoke vengeance on
behalf of themselves. Magic. Like Willow (almost) in "Wild At
Heart." Okay.
Amusing moment I'm fond of...
Anya: A load bearing bar matron.
D'Hoffryn: Is there any other kind?
Willow, kinda standing outside the center of the action, triggers a few
of its central plot points. The first comes with her interactions with
Anya, quickly figuring out that the latter isn't a good liar. Even
if one ignores her slow-moving conscience, Anya couldn't have hidden
what she'd done for long. It's exciting to see Wil her back on top
of things, with the casual way she deflects the spider attack. And of
course stuck in there is a little reminder of how thin the line is
between the fun, cuddly character she wants to be and the contemptuous
and violent individual that's also part of whom she is. Naturally,
she has to be the first one of the group to try to reach out to Anya
and help her get over the mass-murder; that's the way such things
work in the Buffyverse.
I've already brought up the Willow/Anya parallel. Just wanted to add how
nice it is that Willow's impulse is to help Anya. And how using D'Hoffryn's
talisman the way she does represents, finally, a little real atonement for
Something Blue. She found something good to get out of the experience - and
along the way implicitly rejected D'Hoffryn a second time. This time with a
much fuller understanding of what that means. Good for her.
I feel a little strange giving fashion updates, but hey, I noticed
these things: first, Willow's dressing the way Buffy might have in
the show's early days, and second, the workmanlike jeans-and-T-shirt
look is working well for Xander.
Anya's outfit at the end isn't much of a fashion statement, but damn, I
found it hot. Or maybe it's just her with a sword.
This episode is about all of the four main Scoobies, and not so much
anyone else (Trachtenberg's appearance is more or less just so they
can say she appeared).
But long enough to throw in a theme related line. "She(Anya) should try
acting like everybody else more." The episode sure isn't shy about theme
references. My favorite is in the song. "Mrs. Anya
Lame-Ass-Made-Up-Maiden-Name Harris." Funny, but still pointed at lack of
identity.
Spike's cameo is an interesting little scene,
at least. Turning to Buffy for someone to talk to about his insanity
is appropriate both from character and "let's drawing parallels
with last year!!" perspectives. And before the reveal of the
fake-out, I actually did wonder whether she was going nuts with the
sympathy and forgiveness as a response to the end of "Help."
As did I - and still do on repeated view. One of those moments that I
continually forget until the payoff.
So there's a bout of spider-killing, itself an enjoyable battle,
It's a wonderful battle. So different from the norm that it feels really
fresh. Buffy throwing the axe up into the tree is way cool. It's rather a
mark of how good this episode is that it gets buried as just another scene.
which leads into one of those ever-popular scenes in which our friends
get to sit around yelling at each other. And it just may be the best
one yet. Buffy is back on her game as the Slayer. Xander's appeals
all come from the heart, but it leads him to bring the past into play
in a simultaneously funny and moving manner: "This isn't new ground
for us. When our friends go all crazy and start killing people, we
help them." "Sitting right here!" It's wonderful the way
Buffy steers the conversation and keeps it about necessity, showing
gradually escalating annoyance but keeping it under control... and
unloads from time to time with one or two yelled lines when it becomes
too much, then makes herself calm down a little. It's the
combination of Xander's somewhat fair issues with being shut out, and
monstrously unfair accusations of being an uncaring killer that trigger
her "I KILLED ANGEL!" explosion. And finally, after all these
years, Buffy calls Xander to task for The Lie...
No indication that Buffy recognized it as a lie. Xander doesn't admit it.
Willow knows that it's not true, but she wasn't there and may not be sure
why the story came out as it did. In the meantime that gets pushed aside
because Willow has her own problem with Buffy now because she won't go with
her even though Buffy clearly wants her to. Willow makes up for this by
calling D'Hoffryn, but I don't think that really settles that little
disconnect. One more nuance to add to the scene.
but it's not just
for the sake of beating him up over it, it's in the name of proving a
point - "it is always 'different!' It's always
complicated."
I wanted to say something about Scythe's post last espisode and it's
relationship to here, but I'm writing too much as it is. Suffice to say
that the whole, "I am the law," bit is a big deal. (Not just for that
sentence.) However, assuming I'm right about where Scythe is going with
that, I'm not so convinced any of it should be all that evident to you at
this point. Things connect. And, you know, that's not exactly news by this
point in BtVS.
As in "Villains," when she was almost arguing the
opposite side, Buffy emerges as the voice of reason, and the others
can't deny that she makes sense, even if they can't be part of her
fight. That conversation ends with Brendon's delivery on "there
has to be another way" suggesting that he sees that, and Buffy's
convincing and earnest "then please find it." Ye gods, what a
great scene.
The commentary speaks of being sympathetic to all sides. Which is so true.
Xander is showing many of his old Xander elements here, but more than ever
you can't fault him. Indeed, I would say that it's kind of his
responsibility to take the stance he does. Yeah, maybe Buffy did stab Angel
in the end. But it took a long time to get her there, and Xander isn't a
slayer.
One more thing in that scene that I like, (so many nuances) is how atuned
to each other Buffy and Willow are. Not in the sense of exactly agreeing,
but in knowing what each other are thinking. Willow knows Buffy has to kill
Anya. Buffy knows that's why Willow held back telling them. I don't think
we've seen this understanding between them since S5, though there was a sign
of it re-emerging in Entropy when Willow realized that something was up
between Buffy and Spike. I guess helping Willow heal a couple episodes ago
made a difference.
Things then travel to Anya's side, and Xander's continued attempt
to get through to her with his world-saving mouth. Caulfield is at her
best here, with the rest of the cast not far behind. It's odd and
fascinating the way she almost identifies with Buffy as a fellow
supernatural creature who knows what her job "should" be, and then
how she turns on the anger once said Slayer actually appears. Both
segments of the fight are exciting, almost rivaling some of the other
times Buffy's had to face off with a former friend.
I love the action and drama of this. Very sharp. And, yes, recognizing the
inevitability of the showdown is good. (Anya is also someone who has always
taken great pride in doing a job right. I think she might even be insulted
if Buffy didn't approach her with slaying in mind.)
There is some discussion about when/if Anya was resigned to death, and the
metaphorical slaying of the demon.
I think it's pretty clear that she was accepting death when sprawled on the
floor with Buffy above her, sword raised. Fortunately, Xander wasn't so
accepting. I assume the idea was simply Xander saving Anya when he had the
chance. But I've always harbored this notion that he saw Anya give up then
and knew it meant she really was worth saving.
A metaphorical slaying does come with the first impaling. You can tell,
because she's no longer in demon face after. What exactly that means I'm
not certain. Anya continued fighting. Perhaps it's something to do with
mentally letting go of all that history we've seen in flashback. I don't
know. In the real end of the episode she does seem to know there's no going
back and that she's on her own.
As for the idea that she was looking for death all along, I'm more
ambivalent about that. I think it's more that she's on a brink and has to
choose. (D'Hoffryn's solution not yet thought of.) But hasn't yet.
There's a lot of rage here and a lot of her that at least wants to defend
her lifetime of vengeance - pride still coming through. (Here I do still
relate to the Spike parallel and his anger at the chip preventing him from
being a monster and hating to have to make the choice he must.) Anya's
horror and misgivings about what she has done throughout this episode have
been alternated with an angry justification of the deed to Xander, an
equally angry reminder of Warren's flaying to Willow (both of their efforts
to help failing), and turning to Halfrek for encouragement. Halfrek's
efforts are inadequate, but she *is* encouraging to Anya none the less.
So I tend to think it hung in the balance until the final flashback. In my
internal imagining of this, the thing that turns it, makes Anya's mind up in
the end, is Xander asleep in the chair during the musical number. It's the
sleep of the innocent moment when Xander becomes the total lovable lunk.
And Anya loses all her heart for vengeance. She certainly can't be
motivated by Olaf anymore. And the wedding fiasco stops being enough.
("Sooner or later, Anya, that excuse just stops working." - from Beneath
You) Xander gave her too much over three years to support vengeance. (Anya
to Xander at the end - "Thanks. For everything.")
Just another love story.
One of the episode's most unorthodox moments comes when Anya is
abruptly stabbed through the heart to close act three. My eyes popped
wide open there. And then act four spends like three minutes taking us
back to Sunnydale, 2001. Can't say I saw that coming. It's
strange and maybe gimmicky, but given that it would work so well as
either a eulogy or a restatement of theme en route to her surviving,
good on it. I don't like having to be reminded of dumb things like
the end of "Hell's Bells" and the source of the spell in OMWF,
both of which are part of this episode, but such are the perils of
serialized TV.
What's wrong with that? *g*
I think they had in mind recalling something iconic to emphasize how tied in
to Xander she was. According to the commentary, they had toyed with the
idea of recalling Hush, but decided the silent approach wouldn't work so
well in this episode. So Goddard had the gumption to ask Joss to write a
new song - and got his wish in a day.
I don't actually like the song all that much. Kind of clunky. But it gets
its point across well, better I think than the Hush idea would have. And
wedding dress to sword in chest... Phew! That's some transition.
If anyone cares, I didn't notice the mustard until I saw it on the
transcript, but that's pretty funny. And speaking of dumb but funny,
"oh, breathtaking. It's like somebody slaughtered an Abercrombie &
Fitch catalog."
I like the mustard bit - which is nice, 'cause that's the one number in OMWF
that I hated.
D'Hoffryn's line is priceless - as is his whole performance. Almost makes
me wish he'd been a regular, though I don't think he's the kind of demon
Buffy would have wanted to face.
Meanwhile, seems like every plot thread of "Selfless" is heavily
tied to the past. That amulet that Willow's had for the past three
years comes into play as she takes it upon herself to have another chat
with D'Hoffryn. (And keep in mind, Willow + strong magic, especially
in the name of helping friends + evil impulses = potentially bad, which
is perhaps why the "shut your whimpering mouth!" scene is in this
episode. And which makes the callback to "Something Blue" seem
even more appropriate. "Selfless" is put together so well.)
Everyone's favorite demon patriarch may be a dick, but he's also
the one to remind everyone that Anya has her own existence
independently of everyone else (or should), and should thus be the one
to decide whether her vengeance can be undone.
About D'Hoffryn. Yes, he's one mean SOB. Arguably the most powerful and
truly destructive demon over time we've seen on the series. Even so, he
seems to work within some kind of controlled framework with its own weird
ethics - albeit ones that don't preclude maximum pain. I really like how
his conclusion with Anya comes in the form of a wish.
Also, I think D'Hoffryn's anger with Anya is his version of hurt. Not that
I want to remind you of Hell's Bells again (oh, hell, of course I do), but
he showed what sure looked like genuine affection for Anya then. And
Halfrek insinuated that Anya was D'Hoffryn's favorite. I think he's lashing
back at Anya for rejecting him - which is a pretty neat transferance of the
rejection theme in Anya's life. Here, Anya does the rejecting, and in the
process leaves that part of her behind.
That leads into a second attempt to make the viewer think that she
might die. At this point, I was suspecting that if the show wanted to
kill Anya, it'd have done so already, so I was all prepared to get
annoyed over all this buildup and misdirection for nothing. As it
turns out, Anya lives, and the buildup isn't for nothing at all.
D'Hoffryn echoes a Mutant Enemy writer's credo: "never go for the
kill when you can go for the pain." And throw in another reference
to the "beneath you it devours" thing for good measure, just to add
to the sense of rising action tying together the individual episodes of
early S7. I love this show. Even when trying to atone, Anya's a
killer. Death is too easy a redemption in the Buffyverse. Never much
cared for the character of Hallie, so it's a double blessing to see
her death used so effectively.
I liked Halfrek. A lot, actually. I think she may be the most effective
symbollic character ever on BtVS. (Offhand I can't think of anyone else
quite like her.) Essentially she is Anya. Her function from the start was
to remind Anya, us, everybody what being a vengeance demon really means.
And especially to remind us that Anya had never gotten rid of that within
herself. Her death here I think is more the metaphoric death of Anya's
demon than was the sword through the chest. She also served the practical
function of having previously established that a sword through the chest
doesn't kill vengeance demons.
Regarding Xander's final exchange with Anya: "Xander - what if
I'm really nobody?" "Don't be a dope." Such a sweet insult.
You know what that reminds me of? It's ROT13ed for those who for
some reason still haven't seen _Firefly_. Ohg ng gur raq bs
"Freravgl" (gur rcvfbqr), Fvzba erfcbaqf gb Evire'f tengvghqr naq
qvforyvrs gung ur'q or noyr gb fnir ure jvgu "lbh'er n qhzzl;"
clearly not true, but it somehow conveys more affection than a more
straightforward declaration of love would. Well, same thing here.
I like how it continues after that.
Anya: I'm a dope.
Xander: Sometimes.
Anya: That's a start.
One final return to the theme of no identity with Anya finally saying she
has to make herself.
Xander is very sweet here, especially since it comes right on the heels of
Anya's thanks for everything - a thanks delivered with a finality that tells
Xander that it's really over. Watching Xander wilt right then is heart
breaking. And just in case you missed the point, the episode closes with
the two walking away from each other.
Just another love story.
So...
One-sentence summary: An episode for all seasons.
AOQ rating: SUPERLATIVE
I think (we'll see) that there is another episode this season that I would
find objectively better than this. But the hell with objectively. This one
matters more to me. Even though her story is smaller than some, it is for
me second only to Buffy's story for its impact. (Yes, more than Spike's or
Willow's stories.) And this culmination of her journey thrills me. In some
ways Anya was a worse demon than the vampires we know. And she lacked the
excuse of no soul that they had. She chose her course more thoroughly than
they did. But when she finally came to understand her humanity she also
finally chose that though it meant her life to do so. (She believed.) I
especially love how she had to become a demon again to understand her
humanity - as it taught her the truth of her demon way.
It's also a great love story, so very different from most we've seen here.
There's a sadness to it, but it's not tragic. Xander and Anya had their
love - in full - and it was wonderful and transforming. Especially for
Anya. Something that's now passed, but not lost.
Going back to the Willow parallel for a moment, Willow went through her life
recklessly grasping at magical power until she ran into power too big for
her and was nearly brought down by it. Anya grasped perhaps more recklessly
than Willow, and was corrupted practically from the start. "My whole life,
I've just clung to whatever came along." But with Anya, what she eventually
ran into was Xander. And true love. It brought her down too. To humanity.
I was thinking about the little to do about my remark about a woman changing
her man - referring to Buffy and Spike. Here we have the reverse of the man
changing the woman. But just as with Spike, in the end only Anya could
change herself. Xander may have shown the way - a tremendous gift - but
it's still up to Anya to go there. This is why they can't be together. And
why Xander leaving her at the altar doesn't matter anymore - was the right
thing to do even though he didn't understand why. Anya can't depend on
Xander - anyone - that way again. That's the Anya that became a vengeance
demon. One way or the other she has to craft herself now. It's a kind of
Annie Hall story. (As weird as it is to bring Woody Allen into this.) The
thing that makes their love special is the thing that requires it to end.
Anya's not the same person anymore. What Xander provided and she needed so
badly can only be in the way now.
I don't quite know how to fit Superlative into your system, so I'm leaving
my rating as Excellent. This is currently sitting #8 all time, but I'm
still in the process of constructing a top ten. It might shift around a
little.
OBS
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I think you missed a close italic tag somewhere in the last eight paragraphs,
I'm confounded as to what episode from S7 OBS might find better since this one pretty much stands head and shoulders above the entrie remainder of the series.
I don't really take much issue with what is said above but I love the moment where EC is beautifully power singing "I will be" in the wedding dress on the porch and is suddenly cut off to Anya in the sexy jeans run through with the sword pinned to the wall, apparently dead.
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Yup. We thought it was just a figurative rating.
what episode from S7 OBS might find better
Guess we'll find out. All I know is that it isn't CWDP...
the moment where EC is beautifully power singing "I will be" in the wedding dress on the porch and is suddenly cut off to Anya in the sexy jeans run through with the sword pinned to the wall, apparently dead.
Very, very powerful moment. *shivers*
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Regarding Xander's final exchange with Anya: "Xander - what if
I'm really nobody?" "Don't be a dope." Such a sweet insult.
Sigh. Don't you hate it when people take words literally? There's a hidden meaning there! Plus, it's obviously a sweet moment. Especially that it's Xander we're talking about here. He'll always try to find something funny to light the mood.
Remember his speech to Anya in Into the Woods? He finished the speech with "I just wanted you to know" said in a sweet, funny manner to light the mood.
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The demon doesn't change her. Never did.
*sigh* I love Anya's story. (And Xander too of course)
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