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Barbie and emotional labour
MANY SPOILERS! Proceed at own risk.
I could say many things - overall I loved the movie and all the many things it did and Margot Robbie is gorgeous and I laughed a lot. (The Godfather! Zack Snyder! Using mansplaining to bring the Kens down: Genius. <3)
But having the whole Emotional Labour Thread in my head, one thing really stood out:
Women do all - all - ALL - the emotional labour in this movie.
Gloria helps to solve Barbie's existential crisis (and then goes on to save all the Barbies), basically by listing how shitty it is to be a woman existing within the patriarchy. But then, once Kendom has been dismantled (and yes it sucks that Ken didn't even have a place of his own - but he didn't ever talk about it, nor did he try to change things in an equitable way, he just stole Barbie's house and then the Kens made all the Barbies into their servants) Barbie then has to go talk to him and make him feel better about himself and help him out of his crisis. Without being angry or resentful or in any way holding him to account for his actions, instead having to gently guide him through accepting the fact that she just doesn't feel the same way about him that he does about her. (Sidebar: I love aro-ace Barbie!)
And it's not like there weren't other candidates for this. Clearly all the other Kens are equally clueless, but we have the whole Mattel board RIGHT THERE. Although their solution is: 'Barbie should be in love with you!' so they're also useless. Or (a much better option - I wouldn't trust an all-male board with much), Aaron Dinkins, our nice everyman, could have stepped up and talked to Ken, being the counterpart to Gloria; the (male) human to guide Ken through his uncomfortable emotions.
I think this is my one main issue with the movie. It's funny and tongue-in-cheek and very very silly, and 99% of it works for me. But this one thing, the way Barbie has to carefully attend to a fragile male ego, just sticks in my throat. Also I can't tell if this is a deliberate choice, or if this is so built in to our culture that they never noticed what they were doing. Everything else is sign-posted - "We have had TWO women on the board!" - but this is played completely straight. Or as straight as anything in this movie. OTOH it might be a deliberate result of the Real World (patriarchy) seeping through to Barbieworld.
IDK. That thread is like the glasses in They Live - not that I wasn't aware before, but it really hyper-focusses on the issue in ways that make you see everything in a different light.
I could say many things - overall I loved the movie and all the many things it did and Margot Robbie is gorgeous and I laughed a lot. (The Godfather! Zack Snyder! Using mansplaining to bring the Kens down: Genius. <3)
But having the whole Emotional Labour Thread in my head, one thing really stood out:
Women do all - all - ALL - the emotional labour in this movie.
Gloria helps to solve Barbie's existential crisis (and then goes on to save all the Barbies), basically by listing how shitty it is to be a woman existing within the patriarchy. But then, once Kendom has been dismantled (and yes it sucks that Ken didn't even have a place of his own - but he didn't ever talk about it, nor did he try to change things in an equitable way, he just stole Barbie's house and then the Kens made all the Barbies into their servants) Barbie then has to go talk to him and make him feel better about himself and help him out of his crisis. Without being angry or resentful or in any way holding him to account for his actions, instead having to gently guide him through accepting the fact that she just doesn't feel the same way about him that he does about her. (Sidebar: I love aro-ace Barbie!)
And it's not like there weren't other candidates for this. Clearly all the other Kens are equally clueless, but we have the whole Mattel board RIGHT THERE. Although their solution is: 'Barbie should be in love with you!' so they're also useless. Or (a much better option - I wouldn't trust an all-male board with much), Aaron Dinkins, our nice everyman, could have stepped up and talked to Ken, being the counterpart to Gloria; the (male) human to guide Ken through his uncomfortable emotions.
I think this is my one main issue with the movie. It's funny and tongue-in-cheek and very very silly, and 99% of it works for me. But this one thing, the way Barbie has to carefully attend to a fragile male ego, just sticks in my throat. Also I can't tell if this is a deliberate choice, or if this is so built in to our culture that they never noticed what they were doing. Everything else is sign-posted - "We have had TWO women on the board!" - but this is played completely straight. Or as straight as anything in this movie. OTOH it might be a deliberate result of the Real World (patriarchy) seeping through to Barbieworld.
IDK. That thread is like the glasses in They Live - not that I wasn't aware before, but it really hyper-focusses on the issue in ways that make you see everything in a different light.
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This in particular reminds me of the men who respond to any discussion of domestic violence against women with "But men are victims too!" Um, yes, sometimes they are, but not in huge numbers and if you care so much about it build some goddamn domestic violence shelters/hotlines/whatever for men!!! Stop just complaining about it!
Barbie then has to go talk to him and make him feel better about himself and help him out of his crisis. Without being angry or resentful or in any way holding him to account for his actions, instead having to gently guide him through accepting the fact that she just doesn't feel the same way about him that he does about her.
You are very right about this!
Or (a much better option - I wouldn't trust an all-male board with much), Aaron Dinkins, our nice everyman, could have stepped up and talked to Ken, being the counterpart to Gloria; the (male) human to guide Ken through his uncomfortable emotions.
This would also have given Dinkins something to do! I really don't feel like that character added anything to the film.
It's funny and tongue-in-cheek and very very silly, and 99% of it works for me. But this one thing, the way Barbie has to carefully attend to a fragile male ego, just sticks in my throat.
Yes. I feel you.
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This in particular reminds me of the men who respond to any discussion of domestic violence against women with "But men are victims too!" Um, yes, sometimes they are, but not in huge numbers and if you care so much about it build some goddamn domestic violence shelters/hotlines/whatever for men!!! Stop just complaining about it!
omg this! Just talking about something does solve it. Get up and organise!
You are very right about this!
And I don't even know if it would have struck me if my hadn't been full of Emotional Labour in the first place... It's just so ingrained.
This would also have given Dinkins something to do! I really don't feel like that character added anything to the film.
I love love love the actor (he's in Sex Education, and then he was the star of SAS: Rogue Heroes (the origin story of the SAS), so I would legit watch him read the phone book, but yeah - he was woefully underused, and I think he could have nailed it. Just an ordinary guy having to live a normal life (not an 'Alpha' or a CEO), they could even have added like 30 seconds of him getting dumped by his girlfriend, so we could have a non-toxic male unravelling the patriarchy. ALAS.
Yes. I feel you.
<3 And otherwise it is SO GOOD and the ending is *chef's kiss*
(Did you see the song?)
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I will definitely check out The Thread sometime! I have it open in another tab!
Just an ordinary guy having to live a normal life (not an 'Alpha' or a CEO), they could even have added like 30 seconds of him getting dumped by his girlfriend, so we could have a non-toxic male unravelling the patriarchy. ALAS.
That would have been so excellent!
I haven't seen it yet (I'm at work so I can't) but I will check it out!
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It is SO LONG, so you might have to wait for another lockdown. *g* Although it's great for reading in bits.
That would have been so excellent!
Alas, what could have been. And it's making people plenty angry as it is!
ETA: A video for you:
Barbie is Asexual (and why that matters)
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I can't stop listening...
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(The Zach Snyder Justice League joke is so good that I think I might have forgiven Gerwig for her take on Little Women.)
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That's... not the name? Is it just called 'Barbie'?
I agree with everything here. The fact Barbie had to tiptoe around Ken's emotions to resolve the situation when he had never told her that he was unhappy with the status quo was... uncomfortably real. Maybe that's the point?
I really can't tell if it's deliberate or not... Which is annoying, but hey ho. The rest is great.
(The Zach Snyder Justice League joke is so good that I think I might have forgiven Gerwig for her take on Little Women.)
Having never read (or watched) Little Women - any version - I can't comment, but that joke really is top tier.
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Yes.
Having never read (or watched) Little Women - any version - I can't comment, but that joke really is top tier.
That surprises me! But it's a really really good joke, yes.
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Little Women was never on my radar - the only 'American' book I grew up with was the Little House on the Prairie series. I know I ought to read it, but 'ought' is a really bad motivator.
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