I read a very good article once about the unacknowledged labor of coordinating things. That even if men seem to be doing an equal amount of housework or child-rearing work, it still mostly falls on women to plan all of it--keep track of all the dates and the needs and what needs to happen when--and men are like 'what, I'm helping' but they have to be told everything that needs to be done instead of being proactive and keeping track of it themselves. Which seems small but actually completely eats your attention and mental energy when you're the one doing it.