Another wonderful chapter which does an interesting job of moving the story along. Thank you! (I'm not sure it deserves 'wonderful', but there will be more coming very soon - the next part is 98% done.)
The pacing and flow of it evoked the feelings Allison were experiencing. There were brief moments of engagement, but mostly time seemed to be flowing around her. In other words, the feeling of 'life on pause' seemed communicated via how the words flowed across the page. (My tired brain is probably not expressing this well, but rest assured this is meant to be a compliment.) I know exactly what you mean, and I am so pleased because that's exactly what I was aiming for. I don't know if you're familiar with Roxette's 'Spending My Time', but that was the feeling I was going for... a sort of aimlessness, where she's stuck, and can't make herself engage with anything.
PS: I loved the part about Allison taking down the 14 yo far more that someone my age probably should. A part of me even wishes you would have included her speech. I have parts of it worked out. Might post it just for you. :)
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Thank you! (I'm not sure it deserves 'wonderful', but there will be more coming very soon - the next part is 98% done.)
The pacing and flow of it evoked the feelings Allison were experiencing. There were brief moments of engagement, but mostly time seemed to be flowing around her. In other words, the feeling of 'life on pause' seemed communicated via how the words flowed across the page. (My tired brain is probably not expressing this well, but rest assured this is meant to be a compliment.)
I know exactly what you mean, and I am so pleased because that's exactly what I was aiming for. I don't know if you're familiar with Roxette's 'Spending My Time', but that was the feeling I was going for... a sort of aimlessness, where she's stuck, and can't make herself engage with anything.
PS: I loved the part about Allison taking down the 14 yo far more that someone my age probably should. A part of me even wishes you would have included her speech.
I have parts of it worked out. Might post it just for you. :)